Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 5 of 6324

Nothing brings more peace, when you stop giving a f*ck.
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01-18-2023 18:49
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When the Lone Ranger needed cancer treatment, it was chemo, sob, eh ?
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01-18-2023 06:07
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My friend Hugh enjoys puns about 80's music. That's what I like about Hugh.
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01-18-2023 06:06
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I think of Frank Zappa Every time I microwave a hotdog
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01-18-2023 06:05
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Woman: *being eaten by a Werewolf* My god, they’re right. Your hair IS perfect!
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01-18-2023 06:05
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What is it about a freshly scrubbed toilet that activates my bowels!?
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01-18-2023 06:03
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i ordered the mcdonald’s land air and sea burger and my stomach quit in the middle of its shift
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01-18-2023 06:02
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It’s cute how Taco Bell gives you 2 little peppermints in the bag with your order, like thanks for your order, sorry about the diarrhea.
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01-18-2023 06:02
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Alexa, trade my personal privacy for a cooking timer please.
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01-18-2023 06:01
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It’s OK, The Phantom Menace. I also came out in 1999 and am a bit disappointing
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01-18-2023 06:01
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When the new girl wants to spend the night; “the couch pulls out, but I don’t.”
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01-18-2023 03:58
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Be willing to walk alone. Many who started with you, won’t finish with you.
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01-18-2023 03:56
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If swimming is good exercise, then explain whales.
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01-18-2023 03:53
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I’m not the bigger person, better leave me alone.
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01-18-2023 03:51
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Biden: No more gas stoves!
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01-18-2023 03:49
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The best thing about a woman on the Right, no ding-dong.
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01-18-2023 03:45
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Activate Flying Monkeys!
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01-18-2023 03:43
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Suddenly, California has too much water! Let’s play a game called, simmer-sin-sink-or-swim.
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01-18-2023 03:39
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Who let: da dog out
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01-18-2023 03:35
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You can’t stay young forever, but you can be immature for the rest of your life.
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01-18-2023 01:28
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