Goodeolboy Funny Status Messages
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Page: 4 of 13
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Even though my house has an alarm, I still like to set booby traps...just in case.
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Possible post if Facebook was around in 1983: DANGIT...street lights are on. Guess who's getting beat with a belt when he gets home :'(
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I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass.
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If you find out your guest has no toilet paper from the other side of the door, you have FAILED as a host.
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Watching the Cowboys. The John Wayne ones, not the loosing ones.
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Attention burglars: We may or may not be home. Or maybe we are hunters, waiting for you to get closer for a kill shot
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"That Wonka is a liar!", exclaimed by my six year old son when he realized his Everlasting Gobstopper was getting smaller and changing color.
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Kind of surprised the half time show wasn't performed by the Kottonmouth Kings.
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Shout out to all the people on my friends list who have hidden me from their wall, and are unable to see this post.
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Don't you hate when you're driving and smell oil or a hot radiator and then automatically assume it's "your" car.
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Today is worse than the day my brothers broke my nose with their stupid football. RIP Davy- Marsha B
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It's always darkest before the dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
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Finally with today's paycheck, I've saved up enough cash to get the "gold" package on my '93 Sentra.
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Nothing says "SEXY" like your woman holding two fishing poles and a tackle box saying "Let's go!".
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Admits he chooses a Presidedntial Canidate on the basis that they resemble someone on the cast of Saturday Nite Live.
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R.I.P. To my seamonkey Oscar~10-20-84 to 10-26-84. You are missed!
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Strange how people will judge stories like Tony Stewart, but try their damnedest to get out of jury duty...interesting.
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After reflecting back on the movie Young Guns, I would say Charlie Sheen finally made it to the "spirit world"
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How many men does it take to open a beer? None...it should be open when she brings it to ya.
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You can tell a lot about a person by how many times they hit re-fresh...
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