Kisstopher Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Walking away from a senseless arguments, makes sense to me!
←Rate | 04-04-2013 07:24 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon What doesn't kill you get arrested and most likely post bail.
←Rate | 04-04-2013 13:57 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I can’t control you're being an idiot, but I can control whether or not you’re on my friends list.
←Rate | 04-04-2013 14:12 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Told my dealer I wanted a sh*tload of Coke but auto-correct changed it to shipload now I owe a Colombian cartel 18 million dollars.
←Rate | 04-05-2013 07:33 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think i'm in pizza with you.
←Rate | 04-05-2013 13:19 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I’m so glad I found you in all this wreckage of a planet.
←Rate | 04-05-2013 14:23 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Forget North Korea and America, the next nuclear war will be between your lips and mine...tonite.
←Rate | 04-05-2013 15:20 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Trillions of stars. Billions of galaxies. So many civilizations. But you’ll never explore one. You’re stuck here on earth hearing about the damn Kardashians.
←Rate | 04-08-2013 00:56 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm such a giving person; if cannibals were cooking me, I'd give them tips on how to make me more tender.
←Rate | 04-08-2013 14:19 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon She: Your cute. Me: My cute what?
←Rate | 04-10-2013 12:26 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you love someone set them free. If they comeback, probably it was a Fast & The Furious Movie.
←Rate | 04-10-2013 12:37 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon The best way to ruin my day is by asking me, "How's life treating you?" or "What's new?".
←Rate | 04-10-2013 12:47 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Menstruation Day 1. Don't touch me Day 2. Hug me Day 3. Don't talk to me Day 4. Why don't you speak to me? Day 5. You never understand me
←Rate | 04-12-2013 05:26 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Guys, never give up. If a girl doesn't reply to your text, call her. If she doesn't answer, knock on her door. They love a persistent man.
←Rate | 04-12-2013 15:47 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon There would be peace throughout the world if they gave away free chocolate with every tampon purchase.
←Rate | 04-13-2013 11:23 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Fellas; Sometimes women say they're fine because they know that's all you really want to hear.
←Rate | 04-13-2013 11:44 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon A relationship that’s needs to be validated and reinforced by being constantly paraded on Facebook for the whole world to see is a desperate relationship that will not last.
←Rate | 04-13-2013 12:09 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon My tombstone will probably say, "Dead, but finally sober".
←Rate | 04-13-2013 13:18 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I see ads on TV with smiling, happy housewives using a new cleaning product, the only thing I want to buy are the meds they must be on.
←Rate | 04-15-2013 08:12 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon RECYCLING RULE 101: if no one saw what clothes you were wearing today, its totally fine to wear them again tomorrow.
←Rate | 04-15-2013 14:11 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  




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