Kisstopher Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Dear Men. When a woman says she doesn't want to talk about it, you'd better shut up, grab a chair and get ready to listen…for hours.
←Rate | 12-12-2012 13:53 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I already hate next year.
←Rate | 12-13-2012 13:06 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon If a man aspires towards a righteous life, his first act of abstinence is from being a douchebag.
←Rate | 12-16-2012 00:46 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Happiness; you have to chase it around, but misery that b itch waits for us around every corner.
←Rate | 12-16-2012 00:50 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have spent almost half of my life trying to come up with new ways to get out of things and situations.
←Rate | 12-16-2012 08:35 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you listen closely to your body while working out, you can hear the calories singing "Just gonna stand there and watch me burn".
←Rate | 12-19-2012 12:57 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Male lions fight to impress the females. Bears do it, crocodiles do it and even men do it. Moral of the story: Females get you killed!!
←Rate | 12-20-2012 09:21 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon The best part about working from home is the alcohol.
←Rate | 12-21-2012 08:12 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just watched a girl choke on her food and this can only mean one thing, she forgot to take a picture of it first and post it on her FB wall.
←Rate | 12-21-2012 08:30 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Either the world didn't end, or heaven looks a lot like my apartment.
←Rate | 12-22-2012 00:12 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Life is just a series of obstacles preventing you from taking a nap.
←Rate | 12-23-2012 03:56 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon No I'm not laughing at you, I'm laughing at what I think of you.
←Rate | 12-23-2012 04:20 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I may be on Santa's naughty list but at least I had fun getting there.
←Rate | 12-23-2012 04:28 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon There's a special place in he'll for autocorrect
←Rate | 12-23-2012 08:22 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you try to use Apple's iOS 6 maps, you might discover a new unchartered continent.
←Rate | 12-23-2012 08:42 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon No thanks, Inspirational guy, but I am only on Facebook for the jokes and the meltdowns.
←Rate | 12-23-2012 10:56 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Earthquakes only happen when Johnny Depp breaks eye contact with Tim Burton.
←Rate | 12-29-2012 08:44 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon As long as we don't let our feelings get in the way, this could be the start of something beautiful.
←Rate | 12-30-2012 10:52 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I would walk over Legos for you.
←Rate | 12-31-2012 04:28 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon The next time someone says to me "This too shall pass" they'd better be talking about a joint.
←Rate | 01-04-2013 11:58 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  




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