Goodeolboy Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon Dear McDonalds, Just to let you know, the first 60 seconds I obtain my French Fries they are like a box of fried deliciousness. However, after 61 seconds, they suddenly turn into rubber sticks of sh!t. Work on that
←Rate | 06-25-2012 18:23 by Goodeolboy Comments (0)  

   messageicon Possible slogan for inferior Tampon Co. "We're not number one, but we're still up there!".
←Rate | 10-26-2010 20:13 by goodeolboy Comments (0)  

   messageicon To anyone who would risk their lives for their country foreign or domestic, I tip my hat to you.
←Rate | 11-11-2011 14:55 by Goodeolboy Comments (0)  

   messageicon Just watched the movie Scarface. I'm not one to judge, but if you use your entire hand to make the line you might have a drug problem.
←Rate | 09-21-2011 01:39 by Goodeolboy Comments (0)  

   messageicon What do you call a rooster with erectile dysfunction? Boneless chicken
←Rate | 10-26-2010 20:19 by goodeolboy Comments (2)  

   messageicon Somewhere over the US, there's a drone flying on autopilot.
←Rate | 10-01-2013 23:29 by Goodeolboy Comments (0)  

   messageicon Brrr, today is a good day to double-up on the underwear.
←Rate | 12-05-2013 11:11 by Goodeolboy Comments (0)  

   messageicon Right now in houses across the Nation, parents are trying to explain to their kids where their college funds went.
←Rate | 03-30-2012 23:54 by Goodeolboy Comments (0)  

   messageicon I find it hard to sing the Beach Boys without using my "girl" voice.
←Rate | 05-26-2011 13:36 by Goodeolboy Comments (0)  

   messageicon When you accidentally like a stranger's picture as you scroll on your smart phone.#stalkerfail
←Rate | 04-15-2012 12:14 by Goodeolboy Comments (0)  

   messageicon Why is it that I have to recite the entire alphabet to remember where one letter is?
←Rate | 10-12-2010 00:45 by goodeolboy Comments (0)  

   messageicon You know I'm a Duke boys fan..but how is it Luke always knows short cuts that Bo doesn't? They're always in the car together!!
←Rate | 10-14-2010 00:15 by goodeolboy Comments (0)  

   messageicon Forecast tonight: Dark
←Rate | 10-10-2010 23:09 by goodeolboy Comments (0)  

   messageicon If you're a thug driving a luxury SUV fully customized, don't be surprised when I question the legitimacy of your income.
←Rate | 08-18-2011 10:13 by Goodeolboy Comments (0)  

   messageicon This status, is guaranteed not to be on an E Card
←Rate | 11-17-2013 13:00 by Goodeolboy Comments (0)  

   messageicon Dear Skoal Tobacco Co: Can you please come up with a pouch with a 50/50 mix of tobacco and coffee grounds? Thanks
←Rate | 10-05-2011 14:40 by Goodeolboy Comments (0)  

   messageicon I would say that if my coworkers were picking on me they're leaving someone else alone, but these guys are multi-taskers.
←Rate | 11-08-2013 14:10 by Goodeolboy Comments (0)  

   messageicon Women, don't get a tattoo. That butterfly looks great on your breast when you're twenty or thirty, but when you get to seventy, it stretches into a condor.
←Rate | 10-13-2010 01:38 by goodeolboy Comments (0)  

   messageicon Just discovered: A cup of noodles consists of two noodles, a half mile long.
←Rate | 12-05-2013 15:54 by Goodeolboy Comments (0)  

   messageicon True friends stab you in the front!
←Rate | 10-11-2010 01:02 by goodeolboy Comments (2)  

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