Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   just caught a glimpse of the supermoon coming from behind the clouds.. It looked like..... the moon!

   Supermoon is awesome!!! Oh wait, that's a streetlight.....

   To all you guys out there that "pimp" out your truck , its like dressing your son up in girls clothes.

   Homeless people dont have it too bad; I mean.......they dont have to pay taxes, WORK, pay bills, hell.......they can freakin sleep anytime they want!

   I love old people because they're wise and smell like soup.

   Fact: Tan cellulite looks better than pale cellulite.

   comment "An acute failure of the victim selection process." next time someone post the video of the fat kid body slaming the little bully

   Since when did "Paint By Numbers" make an EYEBROW kit?!?!?!

   Why is Germany sitting out the no-fly Zone? Uh, history of losing in N. Africa?

   Breaking: French warplanes engaging Libyan air force. Related: France surrenders to Libya.

   50% of my weirdness makes the other 50% creepy.

   Note to self: That was way to much beer!

   The national debt is up 40% since Inauguration Day. Unemployment is up 1.2%. We're not only still fighting in Iraq and Afghanistan; we're now engaged with Libya. Gas prices are approaching $4.00/gal, and we're halfway through the fiscal year and sti

   Methinks someone in Washington has discovered that "Hope and Change" is a lot easier to say than it is to deliver .

   So today is officially the first day of Spring! Just think, only a mere 277 more days till Winter arrives again...

   it me or is majority of your high school friends more ‘Antisocial' these days on Facebook. Like we're all strangers or something…..No? Ok its not just me.

   Tell me and I'll forget; show me and I'll rememeber; involve me and I'll understand.

   If Microsoft Word has taught me anything it's that if I want to get a point across, I need to use bullets.

   Im the swaglord you have been blessed

   I argue with myself sometime because I know for a fact that I'll win