Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   Guilty pleasure ...I absolutely am addicted to the show Pop the balloon or fund I mean find love .

   I'm not clutching pearls. But I did drop a few pearls on your wife's cleavage.

   I don't want Canada or Greenland. I want Pizza, Pu$$y, and Football.(Not soccer. They teach roosters how to play that exercise in boredom.)

   oglondam anime uwu

   About a year ago I told my friend there’s plenty of fish in the sea. He's been divorced 3 times..Last I heard he is still sitting there holding his damn rod.

   Menstruation? Should be called Men-Frustration at this point.

   Marked safe from the U.S. banning TikTok. Meanwhile, Canadians are over here wondering if we should just adopt your TikTok refugees

   It's every man's desire to have their butt kicked by a woman. I am living proof of that.

   Cats are nice

   Hurry up and respond with one of your schooyard insults, cuck! Be a good dog. C'mon, just one before we give you time to catch up on all those handjobs at the local jail for rent money 😂

   DreTec Funny Conundrum

   What do you call a snowman in July? ...a puddle

   Worshiping a piece of fabric is what life is all about.

   Cleaning

   I’ll be deep frying something later on, because Sunday is the lard’s day.

   Always hated going to doctor’s even when I’m at my sickest .. not that I don’t trust them … I just don’t feel like paying em!

   Amazon Prime day is the equivalent to Scholastic Book Day when I was in school! Damn I'm old!

   "F" n----s.

   Since 2020 to December 2024, the national debt per person has gone from $80,885 to $106,119. Thats a $25,234 increase. As a family of 4, you just picked up over $100,000 in debt. So since you can’t pay it all, you gonna live it to your kids as inheritan

   JD Vance flew to Greenland to the U.S. military base. He spent just 3 hours there. Then flew home with his tail between his legs, humiliated. All other plans to attend events in Greenland over 3 days were cancel because there was no interest LOL!