Drunk people Funny Status Messages

   When people hate on you, laugh at them, and then start making their voodoo dolls.!

   More people die of car accidents with a Deer than getting killed by terrorists. Maybe we should have them put on the al qaeda watch list.

   if I had a beer for everytime you were gay, i'd be like really really drunk

   the idiot who wrote about the Porshes and Mexicans, the last time I check people in the US cant afford to buy a car

   it's ridiculous how ghetto people or illiterate people for that matter confuse Barack Obama with Baraka from Mortal Kombat II...

   See below: Are you people that dumb!? Now I know why we're in the predicament we are in.

   Australia Doesn't Exist And People Who Live There Are Actors Paid By NASA.

   Come on people, drink a cup of Folgers and wake up.

   People don't seem to realize that doing what's right is no guarantee against misfortune.

   Relationships are for two people, but some people just don't know how to count...

   thinks I feel great when I go to bed drunk. I wake up feeling crap. Obviously sleep is bad for you!!!!

   Nothing brings two people closer than the hatred of a third person.

   When sh!t hits the fan, you have to make the decision to stop chilling with people who throw their own feces at ceiling fans. Seriously guys

   I think if some people were to actually post something positive on Facebook they would spontaneously combust. Frickin Emos!!

   Why don't people throw all of their paperwork up in the air when they're frustrated, like they used to do in 80s movies? It feels great.

   Alarm Clocks.....Making people "Rise and Whine" since its invention

   There's no feeling in the world like when two people want each other so bad... to die.

   Anyone can sell things people eat. The Bay leaf salesman is a true salesman!!

   I would love to send so many people on One-way trip to Mars.

   Angels are just dead people who drink Red Bull.