Drunk people Funny Status Messages

   I wouldn't have to manage my anger if people would manage their stupidity.

   I am not really scared that the world will end on 12/21/2012...I"m just scared of what crazy things people will do on that day.

   The problem with all these Ivy League MBAs is they have learned to treat consumers as statisics and forgotten how to treat customers as people.

   Sometimes people put up walls, not to close people out but because they’re in the construction business and that’s kinda like their job.

   It is just a fact that some people are not comedians no matter how hard they try

   Five Secrets of Successful People: 1. Don't 2. Tell 3. Anyone 4. Your 5. Secrets

   Come on people I don't think we are ready for a woman president!! I can't believe no ones asking her the important questions like can she cook!!!

   i hate when people think their special and that my p0sts are about them....

   if you assume all people are crazy, the mystery of life would be solved.

   It has come to my attention that some of you are eating the bottom half of cupcakes. That is the peel, people. Know your fruit.

   Over a thousand people die in Africa because of Ebola they get 10minute news coverage , one Australian is suspected to have Ebola gets hours of news coverage

   My friend said, "Dude, i'm drunk, call me a cab." I handed him a beer and said, "You're a cab." (true story)

   Like if you always wonder why people in cartoons never change their clothes.

   How the heck can people get so excited over a game that can end in a tie? Is it gratifying when you're kissing your sister as well?

   I wonder how people would react if I walked into Sea World with a fishing pole.

   Dear Facebook: You keep offering up people for me to "friend", but then you get all concerned and ask me how I know them. You can't be the pimp and the cop!

   People spend their entire lives waiting for their ship to arrive, not realizing that they are in fact standing in an airport

   I bet you're one of those people who take speed limit signs seriously.

   Good people die because they don't deserve to suffer here on earth so God takes them to a better place.

   ‎"One of the few things I really about FaceBook is that you can post or quote almost anything and few people will question it."- Abraham Lincoln :)