Drunk people Funny Status Messages

   what? Donald Trump is the president??? (people without internet)

   I don't get why all these people are saying "Not My Precedent!" Do they share a shameful past?

   Preschoolers talk a lot of trash when playing Chutes and Ladders for little people who needs help counting spaces.

   We have reached a disturbing stage as a society. A stage where if you do something stupid, disturbing, sick, nasty, disgusting or perverted, you are guaranteed to have some people who are going to cosign and support it.

   People sometimes confuse deal-making skills with having enough money to bully the little guys into doing what you want.

   Number 1 reason people voted for Hillary Clinton - They couldnt figure out how to tell their parents they were gay.

   People should only be allowed to take selfies as often as they renew there license.

   Surely if Steve Buscemi of all ugly people can have a successful career in Hollywood, there is nothing that should stop you from achieving your own goals.

   The country is going down for the simple fact that some people really hate Trump. Let that sink in

   my uber driver is playing marilyn manson so guess i'm gonna get drunk and put on eye liner tonight

   Moron is more of a complement, compare to the other terms people use.

   The ocean is so deep that most people can't fathom it.

   My dog Max has a problem with chasing people on a bike. It finially reached a point yesterday where I had to take his bike away.

   Don't take it personal. I gave up on people in general years ago.

   If you can lay on the floor without holding on...... You're not drunk.

   Got drunk last night and joined the Space Force.

   instead of talking about who people whould vote for, maybe gef off social media and actually go put and vote if you want change

   Light travels faster then sound. This is why some people appear bright untill you hear them speak.

   I haven't dated since the 1990's, do people still use the pickup line "Wassssssupp?"

   Life is not a fairy tale guys........if you lose a shoe by midnight your drunk.