Drunk people Funny Status Messages

   .... In a world where people don't understand the consequences of their actions ..... People shall be hurt .... and People shall perish .....

   Does anyone else get road rage walking behind slow people? Yeah, me neither.

   You had me at, "Why do people keep asking me,what kind meds am I on?"

   If people always gave up when the chances got slim, we wouldn't have heroes...or progress...or a 4 minute mile....

   It's national nude day, grand marnier day, hot dog day and tape measure day. Time to get drunk and measure them wieners.

   These are troubling times, but as an incredibly drunk philosopher once said, “you can’t make lemonade without breaking a few eggs”

   people either say i'm "pretty funny" or "pretty smart" but they always forget the word "and"

   Go Home Eclipse!! You are Drunk!!

   Want to confuse people this Halloween? Wear a Santa Claus suit as your costume.

   Ever been so drunk you ate a frozen burrito?

   I have a lot of imaginary friends. They are real people, I just have to pretend they are my friends.

   The reason people like dogs is because dogs wag their tails instead of their tongues

   Halloween isn't the only day people have trouble desiding what to be.

   Black Friday: Because only in America, people trample others for sales exactly one day after being thankful for what they already

   people.with over attitude mid- finger salute..!!:D

   No one is lazier than the people who name convenience stores.

   Let's face it folks. Time for a real "CHANGE" Voting for trump is a no brainer. Don't you think he'll have the right people in place as President. Like Earl Pitts says, "WAKE UP AMERICA"

   How can ANYONE defend the Theater killer saying "he had every right to do what he did, blah blah blah?!" Are these people out of their minds? I think so!

   Agree or disagree with the Trump protesters....he got more people walking in 1 day than Michelle Obama did in 8 years

   I think the best nicknames are the ones people don't know they have.