Drunk people Funny Status Messages

   Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.

   that you shouldn't base your life on what other people think!

   I hope that after I die, people will say of me: 'That guy owed me a lot of money!'

   A new study says people who sit a lot die sooner. Basically, if you're a tennis umpire with a roommate who paints portraits, you're screwed.

   If you're on someone else's Facebook, the cruelest thing to do is probably to actually add the "people you may know."

   For all of you people making fun of Republicans out there, Just think .. almost half of the people out there vote Republican and there are more out there than you think, One or two might be staring at you right now while you are staring at ur stupid phon

   The more stupid people I meet, the more I understand serial killers and think they should be called serial problem solvers.

   Some people hope their search for happiness ends in love and fulfillment, I just hope mine ends in minimal bloodshed and no felony charges.

   The way that people always talk how they wouldn't do it has convinced me that there is a lot of touching things with ten foot poles that we don't know about.

   Ok now the people answerring the idiot are pissing me off!

   It's okay to hate happy people.

   Energetic people who say "I'll sleep when I'm dead", are already dead to me.

   Once upon a time, I used to care what people said about me.

   The trick is to not let people know how weird you really are until its too late for em to back out

   There are 3 types of people in this world. 1) Those I want to drink with. 2) Those that make me drink. 3) Those I want to throw my drink on.

   The human race as a species is done. People are actually thinking Nicolas Cage is a vampire. Hooray for civilization.

   People I am hating today: Anyone who refers to guacamole as "guac."

   Drunk text etiquette: don't text anything you wouldn't say in the light of day. Nothings worse than the digital walk of shame.

   i dont trust people with so many studio photos

   People hate pigeons because "they are dirty and spread diseases" but the Kardashians and the cast of Jersey Shore do it and pigeons don't hate them....just sayin