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Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
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As a Social Networking Expert, I have evaluated your Facebook activity and your status updates. My conclusion: You're all crazy.
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10-14-2010 12:03 by
Marshall the Great
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"And they lived happily ever after" is just another way of saying "they are in denial."
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10-14-2010 12:00 by
Marshall the Great
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Crazy people are never aware of their own insanity. I'm so glad I'm not a crazy person.
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10-14-2010 11:58 by
Marshall the Great
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Dear CAN, why are your books so much more $$ than mine? - US
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10-14-2010 11:57 by
Skedee
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I dont like my women single.. I like my chicks in 2's
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10-14-2010 11:55 by
Skedee
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Why does mineral water that has "trickled through mountains for centuries" have a "Use By" date?
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10-14-2010 11:55 by
Marshall the Great
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1
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In terms of emotional comfort it is my belief that no amount of physical contact could match the healing powers of a well made c0cktail.
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10-14-2010 11:53 by
Marshall the Great
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Love is not the dying moan of a distant violin - it's the triumphant twang of a bedspring.
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10-14-2010 11:50 by
Marshall the Great
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Dude... "Who else would put up with me?" is not a good compliment to give your girlfriend.
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10-14-2010 11:48 by
Marshall the Great
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Ya know when ya go on vacation and you just can't wait to get home to take a nice, healthy dump?
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10-14-2010 11:46 by
Marshall the Great
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Show me a person who can be trusted with a laser pointer, and I will show you someone whose soul has died.
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10-14-2010 11:44 by
Marshall the Great
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Nobody notices what I do..until I don't do it.
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10-14-2010 11:44 by
BONNIE
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When I say, "Hold that thought," it's just a polite way of saying I'm not interested.
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10-14-2010 11:43 by
Marshall the Great
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Ringing in the "New Year" apparently is not a valid excuse for showing up to work 3 hours late... in October.
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10-14-2010 11:41 by
Marshall the Great
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.Neighbors get really angry when they catch you on their roof adjusting their satellite dish.
30
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10-14-2010 11:40 by
Marshall the Great
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knows one thing about the speed of light...it gets here way too early in the morning.
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10-14-2010 11:33
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note to mistress...if I am ever trapped in a mine or anywhere that TV crews and the WHOLE world is watching...please keep your a** at home..watch it on TV..I will call you when I can....just sayin..lol Happy Thursday...smile
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10-14-2010 11:26 by
celebritygifter
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now that the Chilean miners are out... any chance we can put the Jersey Shore cast in?
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10-14-2010 11:16 by
JaxWylde
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Prove that lightning isn't wizards fighting. You can't.
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10-14-2010 10:50
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in honor of the Chileans I will be having Chili for dinner:)
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10-14-2010 10:49
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