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Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
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The kids next door challenged me to a water fight . . . I'm just poisting this while I wait for the kettle to boil
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10-28-2010 13:46 by
rockerch!ck
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1
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if I ever wake up in a room full of people and a tape recorder that says, "Hello, I want to play a game," I'm going to be so mad!
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10-28-2010 13:41 by
rockerch!ck
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Dear Customer Service: First of all, you should know that I'm typing this with my middle finger . . .
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10-28-2010 13:39 by
rockerch!ck
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Thanks to Facebook, I now know what everyone's bathroom looks like one mirror at a time
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10-28-2010 13:31 by
rockerch!ck
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4
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Then God made saturn. God liked saturn so he put a ring on it.
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10-28-2010 13:06 by
kmk4ever
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The Laker's championship rings were so huge that Justin Bieber was seen court-side wearing one as a choker.
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10-28-2010 12:20 by
Mike M
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0
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I'm no longer addicted to carving jack-o-lanterns. All thanks to the pumpkin patch.
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10-28-2010 12:01 by
Aaron
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0
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[:::] is trick-or-treating for Pop Tarts [:::]
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10-28-2010 11:21 by
mickeybruce
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Some people wait their entire life for their ship to come in, not realizing that they are standing in an airport..
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10-28-2010 11:07 by
The Piper
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dressing up as antoine dodson for halloween. hide yo kids hide yo wife...
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10-28-2010 09:36 by
digger
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CNN just reported "15 shot dead at carwash in Mexico", whoever the gunman was needs to be a sniper in the military, he shot everybody in the car
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10-28-2010 08:58
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0
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I see ur playing hard to get, now watch me play walk away.
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10-28-2010 08:07 by
J-Blow
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Relastionships are like yard sales. They might look good from a distance but close up its just a bunch of crap you dont need
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10-28-2010 08:05 by
J-Blow
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Automatic doors make me feel like a Jedi
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10-28-2010 06:32 by
itsmyswag
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Today's productivity is brought to you by Nescafé and fox's biscuits
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10-28-2010 05:53 by
Timlet
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0
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How come when your wifes pregnant, all her female friends rub her tummy & say congratulations! But nobody rubs your balls and says good job!
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10-28-2010 05:47 by
de_one
Comments (
10
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What do you call an organic compound in which a hydroxyl is bound to a carbon atom of an alkyl?.........See, sometimes alcohol is the answer
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10-28-2010 05:41 by
itsmyswag
Comments (
3
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Sometimes I just want to run up to a stranger on the street and say "YOU'RE IT!!" and then run away
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10-28-2010 05:36 by
itsmyswag
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wants to do something different today so is thinking about sitting on the TV to watch the sofa!!!
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10-28-2010 05:34 by
itsmyswag
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0
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Machete Don't Facebook
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10-28-2010 04:25
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1
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