Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   Confucius says man who argue with wife all day get no piece at night...

   To Like Your Own Status Or Picture On Facebook Is Like High-Fiving Yourself!!!

   Women like silent men, they think they're listening.

   War does not determine who is right – only who is left

   I wish that some conversations came with a fast-forward button.

   not taking coupons from giant chickens anymore. Not after last time.

   I keep trying to avoid trouble but I think it likes me...

   Five bucks says I'm totally broke.

   wishes Jersey Shore was like survivor, so they could all vote Sammi off the island.

   The Social Network...Probably the first time I've actually read the book before I saw the movie ...

   The worst part about waking up alone is not having someone to kick out of bed to make me coffee.

   Why are all the birds dyin? seahawks, falcons, ravens, eagles

   An angry mob of nerds can be dangerous. The only thing stopping them from tipping cars is physical ability.

   Reckons that in the right light,at the right angle,if you squint & stand on on leg,I might look like I give a damn

   Facebook should have a ”no one cares” button

   I put minute rice in a slow cooker and it took 3 hours

   Money doesnt buy happiness it buys crazy a$$ happiness

   eating a raccoon taco, anybody want some?

   if Tyler Perry controlled facebook, it would have more drama and more cross dressing old men with family lessons....Be glad Tyler Perry does not own Facebook.

   Happy National Nothing Day!