Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon She came to me one night. Explored my body, licked, sucked, swallowed! When satisfied, she damn left & I was hurt!!... stupid mosquito!
←Rate | 07-18-2010 23:32 by BEGO Comments (0)  

   messageicon Why do girls run from the ones that make them happy, and fight for the ones that make them cry?
←Rate | 07-18-2010 23:12 by BEGO Comments (0)  

   messageicon Children in the dark cause accidents, accidents in the dark cause children
←Rate | 07-18-2010 22:40 by BEGO Comments (0)  

   messageicon Ladies, just a reminder...the same rule applies to spray tans as is does to Make up...less is more!
←Rate | 07-18-2010 22:21 Comments (0)  

   messageicon OK Fellas, this one is for you. Be careful who you pick up and take to bed. With wigs, weaves, fake nails, padded bras and pants; you could go to be with a girl that looks like Janet Jackson and wake up with one that looks like Tito!
←Rate | 07-18-2010 22:18 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I love haters! they're always thinkin of me!
←Rate | 07-18-2010 22:07 Comments (0)  

   messageicon If a man stands in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?
←Rate | 07-18-2010 22:00 by LJG Comments (0)  

   messageicon How is my Facebooking? call 1-800-DIS-LIKE
←Rate | 07-18-2010 21:23 Comments (0)  

   messageicon has status electricity...if you get too close there maybe status friction and you'll get status shock.
←Rate | 07-18-2010 21:23 Comments (0)  

   messageicon if you want me to go running with you, I'm going to need some motivation... Like a clown waving a bloody knife and chasing us.
←Rate | 07-18-2010 21:16 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

   messageicon Men - Alcohol impairs your ability to make good decisions. We don't want you to lose that ability... we want her to.
←Rate | 07-18-2010 21:07 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  

   messageicon When I say "I understand", it doesn't mean I agree, it doesn't mean I understand, it doesn't even mean I'm listening.
←Rate | 07-18-2010 21:03 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  

   messageicon there a logical reason why Chelsea Clinton looks more like Janet Reno than Bill Clinton?
←Rate | 07-18-2010 21:00 Comments (0)  

   messageicon, how do you like these 4 foot high walls here in the Mens room?...See that Mariner game last night? Nice belt...Alligator? You have a piece of chive in your teeth...umm, ok, well..whatcha say we just do the wipe thing at the same time and split?
←Rate | 07-18-2010 20:58 Comments (0)  

   messageicon If Goth kids are supposed to be "non-conformist," then why do they all look alike?
←Rate | 07-18-2010 20:24 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Cool like the other side of the pillow.
←Rate | 07-18-2010 20:06 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Woke up this morning on a hotel room floor laying on a make-shift bed I made entirely out of a tuxedo and towels. Still not quite sure where my pants are. God I love weddings.
←Rate | 07-18-2010 19:34 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

   messageicon Does Facebook ever stop to think that maybe, just maybe, I don't care who changed their profile picture?
←Rate | 07-18-2010 19:33 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

   messageicon Just because you don't approve of the way I live my life, it does not make me wrong, it only makes you judgemental.
←Rate | 07-18-2010 19:31 Comments (0)  

   messageicon KY should just go ahead and make lip gloss already.
←Rate | 07-18-2010 18:22 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

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