Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Before you came along we were hungry. Now we are fed up.
←Rate | 07-27-2010 21:51 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Keep talking........ I always yawn when I'm interested.
←Rate | 07-27-2010 21:49 Comments (1)  

   messageicon It's hard to get the big picture when you have such a small screen.
←Rate | 07-27-2010 21:46 Comments (0)  

   messageicon There's no such thing as being "big boned." How many fat skeletons have you ever seen???
←Rate | 07-27-2010 21:46 by Nunthewizr Comments (1)  

   messageicon I don't know why some girls refuse to use a porta-potty. It's not like us men pee on the seat on purpose...geesh:)
←Rate | 07-27-2010 21:44 by Nunthewizr Comments (1)  

   messageicon Pop Rocks and Condoms! All I can say is WOW!
←Rate | 07-27-2010 21:37 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Why do they always staff the slowest cashier at the express lanes at Walmart?
←Rate | 07-27-2010 21:19 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  

   messageicon just got a phone call reminder from my dentist about an appointment to come in for a cavity search...
←Rate | 07-27-2010 20:51 Comments (0)  

   messageicon The Stones are doing a farewell tour. Gonna miss Fred and Barney.
←Rate | 07-27-2010 20:50 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I can be the only guy at Walmart at two in the morning but as soon as I whip that box of Tampax on the belt, the checkout line is full and they do a price check.
←Rate | 07-27-2010 20:44 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  

   messageicon Dang Kobe, first Artest and now Matt Barnes!? Talk about keeping ur friends close and ur enemies closer! Lol
←Rate | 07-27-2010 20:43 Comments (0)  

   messageicon It's never a good sign when you lift a girls skirt and find a fly strip dangling down.
←Rate | 07-27-2010 20:39 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Suppose I should get a girlfriend. Yep, I'm almost out of cologne.
←Rate | 07-27-2010 20:38 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  

   messageicon My poor girlfriend. She's been sick every morning so far this week. I hope she starts to feel better.
←Rate | 07-27-2010 20:31 Comments (1)  

   messageicon I like to play "Rodeo Cowboy" with my girlfriend. Whenever we're making love and I'm behind her, I call her by a different name and see how long I can hold on.
←Rate | 07-27-2010 20:21 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  

   messageicon wonders why all the old people talk about how far they walked to school back in the day...didnt anyone live close to the school back then
←Rate | 07-27-2010 20:05 by Eddy Comments (0)  

   messageicon when the smog clears in Los Angeles, UCLA...
←Rate | 07-27-2010 19:29 Comments (0)  

   messageicon breaking news! Suicidal twin kills sister by accident!
←Rate | 07-27-2010 19:27 Comments (0)  

   messageicon If we arent meant to have late night snacks then why is there a light in the fridge?
←Rate | 07-27-2010 19:05 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I met a girl in a pub last night.We ended up going back to hers.After a few more drinks, we started kissing & having a bit of foreplay on the sofa.She looked at me and said, "Let's take this upstairs."I said,"Okay you grab one end and I'll grab the other.
←Rate | 07-27-2010 19:02 by lemonpillow Comments (2)  

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