Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Wonders why are there so many whales on shark week this year. Opppss, never mind. I was watching "The View"
←Rate | 08-04-2010 00:30 Comments (1)  

   messageicon Bristol Palin has called off her wedding. A Palin calling it quits? Say it isn't so.
←Rate | 08-04-2010 00:27 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Brett Favre has just announced he is going to play for the Miami Heat this seaon!
←Rate | 08-04-2010 00:20 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Wondering If I can get a clock that tells woman time. You know, "be back in a minute"=1-2hours. " be right there"=anywhere between 25 to 45 minutes. and of course the imfamous, "Lets just stop by and say hi."= 6hours plus. And last but not least, "just
←Rate | 08-03-2010 23:04 by Corey C Comments (8)  

   messageicon You may think I'm dumb but you over estimate me.
←Rate | 08-03-2010 21:44 by Nunthewizr Comments (0)  

   messageicon Drugs give me the confidence to do things I never thought possible. Like, lead police on a 12 hour high speed chase.
←Rate | 08-03-2010 21:41 by Aaron Comments (0)  

   messageicon on a spinny chair... now you see me... now you don't... now you see me... now you don't...and I get a paycheck for doing this lol
←Rate | 08-03-2010 20:43 Comments (0)  

   messageicon The thing about unreliable people is that they are very consistent at what they do.
←Rate | 08-03-2010 20:03 Comments (0)  

   messageicon men's prison is a lot like facebook...if someone really likes you, they'll poke you a lot
←Rate | 08-03-2010 20:03 by Eddy Comments (0)  

   messageicon NOT being considered to be a judge on American Idol!
←Rate | 08-03-2010 19:42 by Maureen Comments (0)  

   messageicon I was arrested for impersonating a police officer last night.It turned out alright in the end though; I let myself go without pressing any charges.
←Rate | 08-03-2010 18:31 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  

   messageicon why is the butter always in the back of the fridge??
←Rate | 08-03-2010 17:59 Comments (0)  

   messageicon If you go to jail and get punked for your shower shoes, pissing on your feet is an equally effective way to disinfect.
←Rate | 08-03-2010 17:01 Comments (0)  

   messageicon a lady cop pulls over a drunk, and says sir, anything you say may be held against you. the drunk man yells "titties"
←Rate | 08-03-2010 16:24 by christina@twittername Comments (0)  

   messageicon the one that started today's Brett Favre is set to retire rumor and is watching the aftermath unfold. Haha..gotcha!!
←Rate | 08-03-2010 16:08 Comments (0)  

   messageicon A penny saved is a penny earned. But its easier just to take from the "Take a penny, leave a penny" jar at the store. Afterall, that's why its there.
←Rate | 08-03-2010 16:02 Comments (0)  

   messageicon always carrying brass knuckles, cause you never know.
←Rate | 08-03-2010 15:49 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Time to put on my best sexual harrassment suit. It's much like my birthday suit, just... Okay, it's exactly like my birthday suit.
←Rate | 08-03-2010 15:45 by Aaron Comments (0)  

   messageicon has been on detox for 4 days and now knows how missisippi got it's name.
←Rate | 08-03-2010 15:08 by mat Comments (0)  

   messageicon I had a thought, then it smiled and waved goodbye.
←Rate | 08-03-2010 15:07 by Aaron Comments (0)  

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