Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon You can lose alot of money chasing women but you'll never lose women chasing money!!
←Rate | 06-29-2010 04:51 by sam rabee Comments (0)  


   messageicon yeah and you have justin bieber......... your play america
←Rate | 06-29-2010 03:45 Comments (5)  


   messageicon Wants to find something else for my dryer to eat besides one of every sock.
←Rate | 06-29-2010 03:11 by Corey C Comments (0)  


   messageicon Everytime I watch the Movie "Free WIlly" I feel so badly about the hunting of these fish that I "Free" my own!
←Rate | 06-29-2010 01:09 by Poser Comments (0)  


   messageicon watching his weight.... go up and up
←Rate | 06-29-2010 00:19 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some people want to do crazy things and green amphibians we just want to have good time! Some people go woo they go quack quack some people nothing and want nothing and arent free, some people want to burn the world with greed, we just want good time!
←Rate | 06-29-2010 00:10 Comments (2)  


   messageicon hoping U.S. Solicitor General Elena Kagan is confirmed to the Supreme Court, so comedian Mike Myers can return to SNL to impersonate her.
←Rate | 06-28-2010 23:47 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I never knew pain till I threw up those pretzels
←Rate | 06-28-2010 23:28 Comments (1)  


   messageicon not stalkig you but thinks you look really nice in that shirt
←Rate | 06-28-2010 23:22 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Men: if your woman makes you sleep on the couch, use the cushions to build an awesome fort and then hang a "no girls allowed" sign.
←Rate | 06-28-2010 21:22 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon The only thing I hate more than people who make fun of other people is people who don't laugh when I do it.
←Rate | 06-28-2010 21:21 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon Walmart smells like ugly
←Rate | 06-28-2010 21:21 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't trust people who don't have middle names...
←Rate | 06-28-2010 21:20 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon After months of uninterrupted analysis, I am now prepared to conclude that, indeed, my laundry is not going to fold itself.
←Rate | 06-28-2010 21:20 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon If the store didn't want me to flop naked into the frozen foods, it shouldn't have put them so close to the front door on a 90° day.
←Rate | 06-28-2010 21:19 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just got a chance to listen to my voicemails. I was pretty popular in 2009.
←Rate | 06-28-2010 21:19 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm getting bored with gravity. Time for an update with new features, universe!
←Rate | 06-28-2010 21:17 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon She said: "I'm not looking for a relationship right now." What she meant: "I'm holding out for an asshole who's emotionally unavailable."
←Rate | 06-28-2010 21:17 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon Tip: if you're going to call out sick, make sure your co-workers aren't your FB friends and can see the pics you posted drunk last night
←Rate | 06-28-2010 21:16 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon This day needs more yesterday...
←Rate | 06-28-2010 21:16 by Joser Comments (0)  



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