Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Whoa, this weather is bringing out everything.. Theirs some old people out driving right now and don't even know it..
←Rate | 02-16-2011 15:40 by Wolf Comments (0)  


   messageicon PLEASE NOTE... Facebook has changed its News Feed, so that by default, you can only see updates from people you've recently interacted with! To change this, click on the arrow next to 'Most Recent', then 'Edit Options', and check the box to receive updat
←Rate | 02-16-2011 15:37 by Eduardo Ramos Comments (0)  


   messageicon I CAN'T believe I am 50 years old! What.... I'm 57? I CAN'T believe I have Alzheimers!
←Rate | 02-16-2011 14:35 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why didn't they just kill Gilligan on Gilligan's Island? If he hadn't messed things up all of the time, they could have been off that island years before. And what's with Skipper? You don't get that fat eating coconuts. That guy is hiding something.
←Rate | 02-16-2011 14:21 Comments (0)  


   messageicon this one sucks.. keep scrolling
←Rate | 02-16-2011 14:20 by SHARPIE Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes I like to press ‘2' for spanish….and scream, “LA MIGRA!!!! RUN FOR THE TUNNELS!!!!!”
←Rate | 02-16-2011 14:11 by M.A.C. Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've only got a couple more years in my "fat stage of life" before I start getting refer'd to as the "fat friend"
←Rate | 02-16-2011 13:47 by @daddybullfrog1 Comments (0)  


   messageicon thinks you have been single too long when lubraderm sends you a Valentines card.
←Rate | 02-16-2011 13:34 by george Comments (0)  


   messageicon had a go on one of those fairground stalls where you shoot a duck and you win a prize . I noticed if you aim the gun at the owner of the stall you get all the prizes
←Rate | 02-16-2011 13:30 by mafiaz Comments (0)  


   messageicon has just been banned from tesco.. apparently you're not supposed to pour water into the bucket marked "Pakistan flood appeal"
←Rate | 02-16-2011 12:39 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I am ever on life support and you pull my plug, wait 5 minutes and plug it back in.It seems to work great on my modem!
←Rate | 02-16-2011 12:27 by deaninkc Comments (0)  


   messageicon Whenever I exit a public toilet... I make sweaty eye contact with the person waiting and say “Top that, cowboy.”
←Rate | 02-16-2011 12:21 by @The69Sheriff Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lady Gaga went to the VMA's dressed as meat, now she went to the Grammy's in a egg. Two more red carpets and she will be a Denny's Grand Slam
←Rate | 02-16-2011 12:05 by SlowMotionNinja Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you were stranded on a deserted island with only a solar powered cd player, and a bieber cd........ how would you kill yourself?
←Rate | 02-16-2011 11:54 by M.A.C. Comments (0)  


   messageicon The word OK looks like a sideways person. I've said OK my whole life and never noticed him. What's up little guy?
←Rate | 02-16-2011 11:53 Comments (0)  


   messageicon What could possibly possess a parent to start a Facebook page for their 2yr. old? What would they (the child) do on here... Swap naptime stories, snack recipes and gossip about the playground with their Day Care buddies??
←Rate | 02-16-2011 11:52 by Matt Man Comments (0)  


   messageicon White Chocolate Milk. Tell me your mind wasn't blown just now...
←Rate | 02-16-2011 11:52 by kris Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just asked my barber for a Justin Bieber haircut... The f*cking idiot just shaved my pubes off.
←Rate | 02-16-2011 11:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm not sure what I find more disturbing, my mum being so adamant that my sister's a lesbian, or my dad winking while he says, "She's not, son......Trust me!"
←Rate | 02-16-2011 11:38 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why didn't they just kill Gilligan on Gilligan's Island? If he hadn't screwed crap up, they could've been off that damn island years before. And what's with Skipper? You don't get that fat eating coconuts. That fat ba$tard is hiding something.
←Rate | 02-16-2011 11:28 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  



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