Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Native Americans are the most successful strippers because when they dance they make it rain....
←Rate | 06-29-2010 13:46 by Timmy Wallace Comments (0)  

   messageicon Facebook is a procrastinators best friend
←Rate | 06-29-2010 13:34 by FrankieJ Comments (0)  

   messageicon understands this whole concept of cooking and cleaning. What I don't understand, and has not been sufficiently explained, was how this all applies to me or why I should even try?
←Rate | 06-29-2010 13:16 Comments (0)  

   messageicon there a cure for a broken heart? Only time can heal your broken heart, just as time can heal his broken arms and legs.
←Rate | 06-29-2010 13:15 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Sure, I'd love to help you, which way did you come in?
←Rate | 06-29-2010 12:59 Comments (0)  

   messageicon me people need a glass belly button, so when your head is real far up your butt, you can look out and see what the rest of the world is up
←Rate | 06-29-2010 12:57 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I like your style ... I like your class ... but most of all I like your ass!
←Rate | 06-29-2010 12:48 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Common sense isn't common
←Rate | 06-29-2010 12:45 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Today's subliminal message is . . .
←Rate | 06-29-2010 12:44 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Just put together my first "Ikea" some real cardboard CRAP!.......Hey Sweden, here's a bright ikea.....KEEP IT
←Rate | 06-29-2010 12:37 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I kissed a girl on the playground in the summer of '96. Maybe someday she'll find me and we'll hook up again. Who Knows, Until then I'll keep chasing brunettes with big boobies."
←Rate | 06-29-2010 12:20 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  

   messageicon I don't believe I ever heard a man speak worse English with more difficulty, than Christiano Ronaldo in that Castrol commercial xD
←Rate | 06-29-2010 12:16 by Adiiiiii Comments (0)  

   messageicon We have Gandhi - India...beat that...Oh wait... he believed in non-violence
←Rate | 06-29-2010 11:38 by @nirajnagi Comments (0)  

   messageicon thinks that calling some people "white trash" is an insult to styrofoam.
←Rate | 06-29-2010 11:29 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I didn't say it was your fault...I said I was going to blame you.
←Rate | 06-29-2010 11:21 by mom of the wildthings Comments (0)  

   messageicon knows that running the air conditioner 24/7 hurts the environment, but the Earth needs to be punished *somehow* for being so bloody hot.
←Rate | 06-29-2010 10:46 by CS Comments (0)  

   messageicon Shocked Justin Bieber did not win a BET award.....don't worry Justin neither did Hanson, Nelson, or Hasseloff.
←Rate | 06-29-2010 10:41 by @gnarleycharley Comments (0)  

   messageicon Aibohphobia -- fear of palindromes (ironically it is a palindrome)
←Rate | 06-29-2010 10:20 by Eddy Comments (0)  

   messageicon just thrown out of church: I put $100 in the offering plate and the Priest was so excited he asked me to come up front and pick three hymns. I replied, <pointing> I'll take him… and him… and him….
←Rate | 06-29-2010 10:00 by douglas Comments (0)  

   messageicon If my plane is about to crash, I doubt I'll be using my seat as a "flotation device." More likely, it's gonna be used as a toilet.
←Rate | 06-29-2010 09:57 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

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