Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

View All Funny Status Messages

Sort:  Recent   |  Oldest  |  Rating
Trump Filter: ON | OFF


Search Messages:
Page: 4 of 5332

   messageicon Someone on my fb just posted they had just backed synonym buns. I replied, you mean the ones grammar use to make? Now I'm blocked
←Rate | 01-10-2019 09:40 by Mas Comments (0)  


   messageicon I always confuse actresses Meryl Streep and Glenn Close. They both look like men but only one has the appropriate first name.
←Rate | 01-10-2019 07:47 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Quick! While the Government is shut down, let's create a new one.
←Rate | 01-10-2019 06:48 Comments (3)  


   messageicon You can never go wrong with medieval technology.
←Rate | 01-09-2019 23:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Alexa, Get me a divorce."
←Rate | 01-09-2019 22:50 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Since he likes to shut things down, why doesn't he shutdown the shutdown ?
←Rate | 01-09-2019 21:36 Comments (2)  


   messageicon I bought a screwdriver bit for my electric drill. It's useful for converting ordinary phillips screws into non-removable screws.
←Rate | 01-09-2019 14:21 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just cleaned up my friends list. So if you could see this post it means you've made the cut because you're special! Or my worst enemy I just want to keep an eye on.
←Rate | 01-09-2019 11:24 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just blocked someone on Facebook for correcting my grammar and it feelted good.
←Rate | 01-09-2019 10:09 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just build the wall on the Mexican side and call it foreign aid.
←Rate | 01-09-2019 04:23 Comments (5)  


   messageicon Having a non stick pan with a sticker stuck on it saying non stick pan is one of the reasons I don’t think humans deserve control over earth
←Rate | 01-09-2019 01:37 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Would anyone go to a zoo that didn't have walls or fences?
←Rate | 01-08-2019 22:46 Comments (7)  


   messageicon Whats the cheapest way to build a wall? Asking for my President......
←Rate | 01-08-2019 22:09 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Oh maaaan I just heard a great quote. “The symbol of our country should be the Statue of Liberty,not a wall.”
←Rate | 01-08-2019 21:22 by Cicci Comments (2)  


   messageicon You can tell the sex of an ant by tossing it in some water. If it sinks, it' a girl ant. If it floats, it's buoyant.
←Rate | 01-08-2019 19:45 by Joker Comments (0)  


   messageicon taking away a Trans-gender bathroom that critical to people?
←Rate | 01-08-2019 18:03 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My least favorite color was pink, now it's orange.
←Rate | 01-08-2019 17:56 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Haven't looked at Facebook in a while and have been doing things I don't normally do while looking at it like reading books, verbally talking to friends, noticing my surroundings and showering.
←Rate | 01-08-2019 14:22 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you can laugh at yourself you can save others a lot of trouble.
←Rate | 01-08-2019 13:47 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The worst part about watching movies at the cinemas is not knowing how much time you have left until the end of the movie.
←Rate | 01-07-2019 22:03 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  



Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left