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just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory. 
With the "You've Won The Nigerian Lottery" to these "Libido Sex Pill Enhancer" emails I should be leading quite the life.
Judge has got a stutter so it doesn't look like I'm getting a sentence.
I wasn't born or thrust into greatness; I just had the tools and a choice...
thinks the markets are sliding faster today than a disgruntled flight attendant.
You were not "just wondering" now tell me why you asked.
It seems like earlier this week my horoscope would have said "A big change to be coming soon".....Who knows, maybe it did, and I was just reading the wrong one..
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on
I'm never going to grow up. I'm just going to stop hiding what I do from my parents and start hiding it from my kids
Music has charms to soothe the savage breast ...... it can lift you higher then the sky , make you sad or even cry but what it does is it can make life worth living.....
The bikes at the gym I go to are behind a bunch of machines where people are always bent over. This may work for some, but my cardio has suffered as I tend to end my workout earlier when grandma decides to do butt thrusts in my face.
At what point does "experiencing higher than normal call volumes" become "we don't feel like hiring more people."
I bet teaching abstinence in school now days is much easier with the invention of the #FleshLight
The future isn't what it used to be...
An archeolgist is the best husbany any woman can ever get. The older she gets, the more interested he is in her
I saw a jug of 2% milk. I'd actually prefer the whole thing be milk.
Life not only begins at forty, it begins to show.
18.I'd call you a tool, but even THEY serve a purpose.
I have a busy day ahead... I have trouble to start; rumors to spread and people to argue with.
Nothing makes food less fattening than being too expensive. 