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United States population: 323.1 million. Trinidad and Tobago population: 1.3 million. And they just eliminated us from the World Cup. 
On my bucket list: To be chased through a kitchen at a Chinese restaurant like in the movies.
Can you imagine how sexy I'd be if I ate right and took care of my body... I'm not going to, but can you imagine”
I refer to avocados a "Shrekticles" because, you know....
It's getting that Time Of Year where I start Liking All Of My Friends Posts who have a POOL
I can't wait for the day when my kids are old enough that I can drink with them and not because of them.
Do gun manuals haue a trouble shooting section?
Bigfoot saw me yesterday but no one believes him!
Just gave my next door neighbor a giant bag of candy to dump in my sons trick or treat bucket on Halloween so I can go home after one house.
If there's enough room to spell 'bootylicious' on the back of your shorts, it probably isn't.
I'm at my most walk of shame when I'm wearing sweatpants heading back to the buffet for the third time.
One of the hazards of sheep farming must be trying to stay awake while taking inventory.
Germans are going to be hit with large fines if they invade someone else's space! 80 years too late if you ask me?
Imagine surviving Covid19 then China releases Covid19S Plus Pro
I just put a bra on for the first time in a week and nearly dislocated my shoulder.
I’d exercise more often if running didn’t spill the whiskey in my glass.
Man it's already half way through the year. Time flies when the world is falling apart.
So this smoke detector is trying to tell me the battery is so dangerously low that it can only beep 4000 times?
There's no way that whatever mothballs prevent is worse than the smell of mothballs.
Am I the only one that doesn't eat all day then binges 4000 calories in one sitting? 