Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   Be on the lookout for the latest wave of terrorists to enter the USA: M'Balz Es-Hari.....Graabir Boubi....Hous Bin Pharteen...and the most dangerous of the four, I-Zheet M'Draurz.

   In the interest of political correctness, the song will be now called, "Rudolph, the Native American-nosed Reindeer".

   "Do you like water?" 'Yes" "Nice, you already like 61.8% of me"

   if he doesn't treat you like a princess, then he isn't your prince.

   Sex with altar boys? Nun for me, thanks

   Look to the left. Now look to the right. I just virtually b!tch-slapped you.

   We're probably accidentally giving ghosts handjobs all the time

   Taught my boy a lesson today.. When you give your girl a facial, You must wipe off the monitor afterwards.

   D ick Clark has passed, we cant ring in the new year, well played mayans, well played

   WEED: Atleast its not crack!

   I've tried experimenting with drugs. Putting acid in my wife's tea has been the funniest yet.

   Just ate the last bit of food in my lunch box, this overtime now officially sucks!!!!

   Did anyone else think that we would be living like the Jetson´s by now?

   Hey Lady Gaga- Way to add new lyrics to Madonna's Express Yourself.

   Two guys walk into a bar ...... the third one ducked.

   remember afro sheen? now we got Charlie Sheen. ;)

   If you have to steal something. then it's obvious you never needed it in the first place.

   Hmm, a country that's government still wears women's wigs older yes, wiser, me thinks not.

   Get ready for the Rapture 6.0 on October 21st. Yay I have time to get my blunt force zombie hunting weapons ready!

   Some status p0sts are not meant to be liked or disliked, they are just meant to be digested/pondered.