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a B*I*T*C*H, a Beatiful Individual That Causes Hardons 
next time someone calls you a SLAG, say thanks I am Sexy Lovely and Gorgeous
Cider (Apple), Vodka (Potato), Wine (Grape), Perry (Pear), Archers (Peach), Malibu (coconut). I never realised Just how much fun your 5 a day could be.
what do you do wen you see ur ex rollin around your back garden, screamin and shoutin help, help,...stay calm, relax, focus,,, aim and shoot the caunt again..:O)
women are like parking spots; they're whores and liars!
wondering what his dad meant when he said he should have rolled over and shot me out the window...
taking shots of NyQuil and RedBull...
wandering around the neighborhood wearing nothing but bells on his nipples
the coolest thing since sliced bread
taking a dump over the railing of an overpass and making bird noises
a russian factory worker that loves tee-bagging homeless people
making love to a big hairy trucker named Kim
currently stealing your car stereo, stay on the computer!
busier than Mr. Jackson at a daycare!
saved a lot of money by switching to NO car insurance
going to punch your teeth down your throat and come after them like a deranged tooth fairy!
lets party like its 2012....oh wait...
thinks the Media is just milking the negitivity in this Swine Flu situation. On the plus side, there is now recession beating prices on Mexican pork chops.
thought I saw a puddy cat!
has a confirmed case of Swine Flu....it was spotted when his tail began to curl.!! 