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hates Mondays... and condoms 
just ripped his arse hole open with a record breaking turd..
stuck in an elevator with steve tyler from airosmith and is quite scared.
annoyed by old people and think they should all be stangled at birth.
flicked his dog's balls while he wasn't looking..
run out of place's to hide the body's..
likes you. He will kill you last.
an itchy ring. Dont think I wiped properly.
been soo pe occuppied with the upcoming zombie invasion that he forgot to take into account A.I and the power hungry super computer trying to take over the world with its cyborg minions.
Playing x-box.. Err, I mean Lifting Weights
has logged out. You missed him by mere minutes
would give his right arm to be ambidexious
took the "How good are you at Making love" quiz and it asked me for my phone number
Says women will never be as successful as men because they don't have wives to advise them
thought it would be a good idea to superglue a couple coins to the pavement in town and watch people try to pick them up. Unfortunately, the police were watching me glue everything the whole time. I was fined with public vandalism and defacing UK currency
crapping. But then decided to change her status.
chasing parked cars.
you dont need drugs to be dope!!
Bob the builder! can we fix it?!!......no this time we're screwed
tall, dark and handsome 