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once asked a Catholic priest why no one in his church brought Bibles? He said, "I'm not ready to debate our mass with you sir." I said, "Oh yeah, well I am... cause I'm a mass debater! 
there are two kinds of facebook friends... the kind on FarmVille and the kind you like.
good girls blush when they watch porn but bad girls smile coz they know they can do better!!! ;-)
February. It's not a leap year, but feel free to take a flying one anyway.
I laugh in the face of danger, then I hide until it goes away.
finds it sad that the Who's hit single, "Who Are You," has a whole new meaning -- Alzheimers
"Yeah, I'm on faithbook." -Mike Tyson
i dont know much about pies, but daaaaamn you make my banana cream!
wondering if when geriatrics Roger Daltry and Pete Townshend sing, "Who are you?" it has a whole different meaning now.
Golf is a good walk ruined
thinks her Chia Pet has rabies
living in a pineapple under the sea
supports the elderly by watching the Superbowl Halftime show.
"The greatest ironies of life: having the right person at the wrong time, having the wrong person when the time is right, and finding out that you love someone after that person walks out of your sight ...."
Never ask the cop to hold your beer while you dig out your drivers license...
OMG another wardrobe malfunction at the Super Bowl! Did anyone else see Pete Townsend's belly????
..oh dear. Some special ed class somewhere is missing a student..
..lost £50 on the Super Bowl. That's the last time I bet on a horse.
you better keep yo' hands off my Momma and keep yo' hands off my Dorito's.
thinking about building a house made of unopened Bud Light cans and bottles....[The commercial inspired me] 