Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon ❒Taken ❒Single ✔ Dont care anymore
←Rate | 04-12-2011 23:22 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I thinks my neighbor just caught me stealing his Wi-Fi internet.
←Rate | 04-12-2011 23:08 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I swear my pillow could be a hairstylist I always wake up with the wierdest hairdos.
←Rate | 04-12-2011 23:06 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't hate you, I never could. I don't regret meeting you, I never will. But I do regret our relationship. It destroyed our friendship!
←Rate | 04-12-2011 22:56 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon True laziness is being excited when plans get canceled.
←Rate | 04-12-2011 22:41 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you say something really fast it can sound really easy or really hard.
←Rate | 04-12-2011 22:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just took the garbage out. In 3D
←Rate | 04-12-2011 22:31 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon So... after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
←Rate | 04-12-2011 22:28 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I solve many of my problems by simply ignoring them
←Rate | 04-12-2011 22:28 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon After 10 Dos Equis beers, I think I'm the most interesting man in the world
←Rate | 04-12-2011 22:27 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I took everything with a grain of salt and now I have hypertension.
←Rate | 04-12-2011 22:22 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Spring makes every day feel like you're stuck in the office on a Friday afternoon.
←Rate | 04-12-2011 22:22 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Had Maury Povich been in Star Wars, we would have known who the father was a lot sooner
←Rate | 04-12-2011 22:21 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I crack open a beer and get on facebook when I have nothing else to do....and also when I have something else to do....
←Rate | 04-12-2011 20:48 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I run with scissors. It makes me feel dangerous.
←Rate | 04-12-2011 20:46 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The early worm gets the bird. ┌∩┐(◕_◕)┌∩┐
←Rate | 04-12-2011 20:38 by Gman Comments (0)  


   messageicon If the internet is the superhighway... Facebook is that bad accident backing up traffic for miles because everyone can't help staring at it.
←Rate | 04-12-2011 20:37 by Gman Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't steal. The government hates competition.
←Rate | 04-12-2011 20:36 Comments (0)  


   messageicon “Oprah's Secret” sounds like a new line of plus-sized lingerie.
←Rate | 04-12-2011 20:36 by Gman Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dont you hate when you lying to somebody and someone else come out of nowhere like "oh yeah, I heard about that"..... lol.... NO you didnt, cause I made it up!!!
←Rate | 04-12-2011 20:35 Comments (0)  



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