Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Troubles keep me interested in my life :)
←Rate | 04-27-2011 14:34 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I missed a payment on my cable bill....purposely, so I don't have to watch that royal wedding crap!
←Rate | 04-27-2011 14:30 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If State Farm were such a good neighbor they'd come over and pick up all the dog crap in my yard.
←Rate | 04-27-2011 14:27 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey, this Facebook thingy is WAY more fun than talking to each other!
←Rate | 04-27-2011 14:23 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Who invented the brush they put next to the toilet? That thing hurts! :(
←Rate | 04-27-2011 14:20 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I can't stand it if I'm excluded from an activity even if I have no intention of going and don't like those who are.
←Rate | 04-27-2011 14:18 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon If my number of Facebook friends drops, I just assume someone died.
←Rate | 04-27-2011 14:17 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Men Give Give Give Forgive........ Women Get Get Get Forget........
←Rate | 04-27-2011 14:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Tell a girl a million times shes not fat... She'll never believe you... Call her fat once she'll never forget it.
←Rate | 04-27-2011 13:56 by Marshall the Great Comments (1)  


   messageicon Local cemetery raises cost of burials, blames "cost of living".
←Rate | 04-27-2011 13:56 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You should not be angry if all she wants is your money because all you want is her body.
←Rate | 04-27-2011 13:23 Comments (1)  


   messageicon It never dawned on me about how fascinating I truly am until I perused through my Google search history.
←Rate | 04-27-2011 13:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I see by your Facebook bio that you're into crafts, blogging, windmills, cats, food, earwax, wine, jazz, God, gaming. ME TOO!
←Rate | 04-27-2011 12:15 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Did you guys know that turning up the radio fixes almost all your car problems?! Crazy.
←Rate | 04-27-2011 12:14 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Since President Obama had to show his birth certificate... I am going to need Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachmann to show me a copy of their HS diploma... Because I have doubts..
←Rate | 04-27-2011 12:14 by Q Comments (1)  


   messageicon The strangest thing about Obama's birth certificate is that it lists Joe Biden as a witness to his birth. Other than that, it appears fine........
←Rate | 04-27-2011 12:13 by Bill Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Man, It's cute, but can you pick up peanuts with it? Sincerely, Elephant
←Rate | 04-27-2011 10:48 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Dr. Phil, Look man, there's only room for one fake doctor in this world and I was here first. Sincerely, Dr. Pepper
←Rate | 04-27-2011 10:47 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm having a royal wedding watching party...drinking beer out of tea cups.  Pinkies up....chug chug chug
←Rate | 04-27-2011 09:43 by @gnarleycharley Comments (0)  


   messageicon hitting balls into the field of dreams...
←Rate | 04-27-2011 09:41 by ginger curtis Comments (0)  



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