Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon thinks the NFL should stop giving complimentary cutlery sets to the players wives and girlfriends.
←Rate | 04-27-2011 20:17 by mark1965 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Skinny thugs dress like they're fat. Fat hipsters dress like they're skinny. Guys in drag dress like girls. Am I still considered normal anymore by wearing what I'm supposed to?
←Rate | 04-27-2011 18:29 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Toward no crimes have men shown themselves so cold- bloodedly cruel as in punishing differences of belief.
←Rate | 04-27-2011 18:06 by Sting Comments (0)  


   messageicon Safe sex is great sex, better wear a latex 'cause you don't want that late text "I think I'm late" text
←Rate | 04-27-2011 17:50 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Note to self: Do NOT draft Peyton Hillis this year.
←Rate | 04-27-2011 17:08 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm not sure which I find more nauseating, every detail of the Royal Wedding being broadcast, The View, or that they're advertsing the The View's live Royal Wedding coverage.
←Rate | 04-27-2011 16:58 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Now we finally know what Obama was hiding on his birth certificate. Under favorite band, it says: "Nickleback."
←Rate | 04-27-2011 15:02 by Bill Comments (0)  


   messageicon Problem: Always get stuck next to obnoxious drunk guy on plane. Solution: Be obnoxious drunk guy on plane.
←Rate | 04-27-2011 14:45 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I must say you really have a open mind... and a mouth to match.
←Rate | 04-27-2011 14:36 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Troubles keep me interested in my life :)
←Rate | 04-27-2011 14:34 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I missed a payment on my cable bill....purposely, so I don't have to watch that royal wedding crap!
←Rate | 04-27-2011 14:30 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If State Farm were such a good neighbor they'd come over and pick up all the dog crap in my yard.
←Rate | 04-27-2011 14:27 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey, this Facebook thingy is WAY more fun than talking to each other!
←Rate | 04-27-2011 14:23 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Who invented the brush they put next to the toilet? That thing hurts! :(
←Rate | 04-27-2011 14:20 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I can't stand it if I'm excluded from an activity even if I have no intention of going and don't like those who are.
←Rate | 04-27-2011 14:18 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon If my number of Facebook friends drops, I just assume someone died.
←Rate | 04-27-2011 14:17 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Men Give Give Give Forgive........ Women Get Get Get Forget........
←Rate | 04-27-2011 14:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Tell a girl a million times shes not fat... She'll never believe you... Call her fat once she'll never forget it.
←Rate | 04-27-2011 13:56 by Marshall the Great Comments (1)  


   messageicon Local cemetery raises cost of burials, blames "cost of living".
←Rate | 04-27-2011 13:56 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You should not be angry if all she wants is your money because all you want is her body.
←Rate | 04-27-2011 13:23 Comments (1)  



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