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Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
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wondering if Saddam ever said to Osama 'What you need to do is employ people who look exactly like you so they can be found instead.'
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05-15-2011 07:57
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Wonderbra: So named because once you get it off her, you wonder where the boobs went.
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05-15-2011 07:21
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if you have time to update your status as "very busy", then you obviously exaggerated.
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05-15-2011 07:17
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if you post that you are sleeping, you are clearly a liar.
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05-15-2011 07:15
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Its hard to work when the theme song to the Gummi Bears cartoon is running through your head
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05-15-2011 05:47 by
flinnie
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wonderbra was designed by Harry Houdini
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05-15-2011 05:03 by
mdu
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The awkward moment when someone deletes their comment on facebook and you look like you're talking to yourself..!!
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05-15-2011 04:30
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Everyone has their obsession, consuming thoughts,consuming time
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05-15-2011 03:48 by
T-rex
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Who can really hear themselves thinking?
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05-15-2011 03:45 by
T-rex
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What others perceive,what others think,what does that has to do with you? World's a game,why you should be playing by their rules
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05-15-2011 03:34 by
T
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realized that alcohol is not the answer,it just makes you forget the question
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05-15-2011 03:28 by
T
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condoms please; --need a bag?; --no need, this time she's not that ugly
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05-15-2011 01:18 by
XBbios
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Chivalry is dead. And women killed it.
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05-14-2011 22:57 by
Dave Chappell
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has beat anorexia, thanks everyone for your support, now pass the bacon buffet
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05-14-2011 22:17 by
Zach Bevins
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They say, "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get". Maybe its just me but........wont you get........chocolate??
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05-14-2011 21:03
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to do list- 1) shoot video confession. 2) sign over house and children to the bank. 3) make fritters for Parole Officer.
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05-14-2011 20:59
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I like to go into diners and quietly start conversations with strangers about eggs and the apocalypse.
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05-14-2011 20:57
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Was once told by a farmer that thongs are like barb-wire fence. It protects the property without blocking a great view.
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05-14-2011 20:52
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The Count from Sesame Street had OCD, right?
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05-14-2011 20:52
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I got a funny cigarette and a $2 bottle of wine and a beautiful blonde with me tonight!! Life can't get no sweeter!!
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05-14-2011 19:55 by
urboyblue
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