Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

View All Funny Status Messages

Sort:  Recent   |  Oldest  |  Rating
Trump Filter: ON | OFF


Search Messages:
Page: 4896 of 5593

   messageicon wondering if Saddam ever said to Osama 'What you need to do is employ people who look exactly like you so they can be found instead.'
←Rate | 05-15-2011 07:57 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wonderbra: So named because once you get it off her, you wonder where the boobs went.
←Rate | 05-15-2011 07:21 Comments (0)  


   messageicon if you have time to update your status as "very busy", then you obviously exaggerated.
←Rate | 05-15-2011 07:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon if you post that you are sleeping, you are clearly a liar.
←Rate | 05-15-2011 07:15 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Its hard to work when the theme song to the Gummi Bears cartoon is running through your head
←Rate | 05-15-2011 05:47 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon wonderbra was designed by Harry Houdini
←Rate | 05-15-2011 05:03 by mdu Comments (0)  


   messageicon The awkward moment when someone deletes their comment on facebook and you look like you're talking to yourself..!!
←Rate | 05-15-2011 04:30 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Everyone has their obsession, consuming thoughts,consuming time
←Rate | 05-15-2011 03:48 by T-rex Comments (0)  


   messageicon Who can really hear themselves thinking?
←Rate | 05-15-2011 03:45 by T-rex Comments (0)  


   messageicon What others perceive,what others think,what does that has to do with you? World's a game,why you should be playing by their rules
←Rate | 05-15-2011 03:34 by T Comments (0)  


   messageicon realized that alcohol is not the answer,it just makes you forget the question
←Rate | 05-15-2011 03:28 by T Comments (0)  


   messageicon condoms please; --need a bag?; --no need, this time she's not that ugly
←Rate | 05-15-2011 01:18 by XBbios Comments (0)  


   messageicon Chivalry is dead. And women killed it.
←Rate | 05-14-2011 22:57 by Dave Chappell Comments (0)  


   messageicon has beat anorexia, thanks everyone for your support, now pass the bacon buffet
←Rate | 05-14-2011 22:17 by Zach Bevins Comments (0)  


   messageicon They say, "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get". Maybe its just me but........wont you get........chocolate??
←Rate | 05-14-2011 21:03 Comments (0)  


   messageicon to do list- 1) shoot video confession. 2) sign over house and children to the bank. 3) make fritters for Parole Officer.
←Rate | 05-14-2011 20:59 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I like to go into diners and quietly start conversations with strangers about eggs and the apocalypse.
←Rate | 05-14-2011 20:57 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Was once told by a farmer that thongs are like barb-wire fence. It protects the property without blocking a great view.
←Rate | 05-14-2011 20:52 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Count from Sesame Street had OCD, right?
←Rate | 05-14-2011 20:52 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I got a funny cigarette and a $2 bottle of wine and a beautiful blonde with me tonight!! Life can't get no sweeter!!
←Rate | 05-14-2011 19:55 by urboyblue Comments (0)  



Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left