Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon When keeping it real goes bad - making an ass of yourself on your man's facebook wall while trying to mark your territory and make the hos on his friends list jealous.
←Rate | 06-04-2011 14:04 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate when ugly people say "I need my beauty sleep" B!tch, you need to hibernate.
←Rate | 06-04-2011 13:52 Comments (0)  


   messageicon so, you are what you eat. hmmm That's funny, because I haven't eaten any sexy beasts recently.
←Rate | 06-04-2011 13:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'v got a demon in me,evrything I touch goes wrong-The Hangover 2 ♥
←Rate | 06-04-2011 13:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When visiting the plastic surgeon's office, never go for the sales rack.
←Rate | 06-04-2011 13:19 Comments (0)  


   messageicon It doesn't matter where you go or what you do, if you don't check in on Facebook with your iPhone you were never really there.
←Rate | 06-04-2011 13:10 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I was walking down the street and saw my Arab friend shaking a rug on his porch. I shouted out to him "What's wrong Ahmed, won't start?"
←Rate | 06-04-2011 13:05 by Gil Comments (0)  


   messageicon it's very easy for a woman to impress a man. Just show up naked and bring beer.
←Rate | 06-04-2011 12:58 by Jennythe1 Comments (1)  


   messageicon When will women ever learn? Never introduce your man to your hotter friend.
←Rate | 06-04-2011 12:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon lovin' this cold front of 93* its better than tha temp we been havin 103*...sincerely Alabama
←Rate | 06-04-2011 12:31 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Heart {♥} , Please stop getting involved in everything. Your job is to pump blood, that's it...
←Rate | 06-04-2011 11:43 by himashis Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wanna make money through Facebook? Login to FB, Goto Accounts, Account Settings, Deactivate your account and Start Working!!
←Rate | 06-04-2011 11:27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon the awkward moment when you find yourself typing awkward moment status updates
←Rate | 06-04-2011 11:22 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hi ho hi ho, it's off to work I go, to bust my a$$ for very little cash, hi ho hi ho hi ho hi ho
←Rate | 06-04-2011 09:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't want to brag, but I'm pretty confident I could win a spelling be.
←Rate | 06-04-2011 07:22 by JC Comments (0)  


   messageicon asked the dunkin donuts drive thru if the frozen hot chocolate is frozen or hot. The response was ...interesting. Try it!
←Rate | 06-04-2011 07:10 by Jon Brite Comments (0)  


   messageicon Supervisors never get sick but their employees are sick throughout half the year...
←Rate | 06-04-2011 05:18 by BRian Comments (0)  


   messageicon I always feel like I make a connection with a waitress whenever they take my order
←Rate | 06-04-2011 04:35 by BRian Comments (0)  


   messageicon Who goes clubbing in tight jeans with no underwear and forgets to do his fly up? I'm that guy
←Rate | 06-04-2011 03:57 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Osama Binladen.. comming soon to a beach near you...
←Rate | 06-04-2011 03:47 Comments (0)  



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