Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon What is the difference between a woman and a magnet? Magnets have a positive side!
←Rate | 06-06-2011 22:21 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I never knew that "never odd or even" is "never odd or even" spelt backwards!
←Rate | 06-06-2011 22:07 by Surge Yarmolyuk Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Bible teaches you to love - and the Kamasutra explains how
←Rate | 06-06-2011 22:07 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon A second chance doesn't mean anything if you haven't learned from your first mistake.
←Rate | 06-06-2011 22:05 by Surge Yarmolyuk Comments (0)  


   messageicon u have twitter?-yes- facebook? -yes- tumblr? -yes- blog?-of course- life? I opened an account but I don't really use it!.
←Rate | 06-06-2011 22:02 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Girl on Facebook statues : I want a guy that actually give a s**t about me. Guy on comment : I thought about you while I was taking s**t .. does that count ?
←Rate | 06-06-2011 21:59 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lazy Rules #1:The farther away the remote is, the more you like what's already on TV.
←Rate | 06-06-2011 21:56 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon My curfew was lightning bugs. My parents didn't call my cell, they yelled my name. I played outside with friends, not online. If I didn't eat what mom cooked, then I didn't eat. Sanitizer didn't exist,but you COULD get your mouth washed out with soap. I r
←Rate | 06-06-2011 21:55 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey, I found your nose. It was in my business again.
←Rate | 06-06-2011 21:53 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Where would I be without my mother? Probably in the middle of traffic, without my jacket on, talking to some stranger.
←Rate | 06-06-2011 21:52 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm giving up on the silent treatment. Going to start talking to myself again.
←Rate | 06-06-2011 21:29 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon For Sale: Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. Never read because wife already knows everything.
←Rate | 06-06-2011 21:28 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon excuse me ma'am, how many ping pong balls can you fit in your mouth?
←Rate | 06-06-2011 21:28 by jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hitting the LIKE button on your own Facebook status is like sending a text message to yourself then replying.
←Rate | 06-06-2011 21:27 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some people have to realize that not everyone was made with a good singing voice...if they were, life would just be one big musical.
←Rate | 06-06-2011 21:14 Comments (0)  


   messageicon In this kind of weather I expected to see more boobs hanging out.
←Rate | 06-06-2011 20:56 by jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon BREAKING NEWS: Rep. Weiner has apologized to Paul Revere.
←Rate | 06-06-2011 20:53 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Remove the vowels from FEMALE.
←Rate | 06-06-2011 20:14 Comments (0)  


   messageicon This copy of Windows is not genuine... Dang, I'll never find that guy that sold me Windows from the trunk of his car... He seemed legit. Lesson learned.
←Rate | 06-06-2011 20:02 by onecuwldood Comments (0)  


   messageicon im not much for masterbation but it did go off once while cleaning it
←Rate | 06-06-2011 20:01 Comments (0)  



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