Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   thinking... Since the world is ending tomorrow; meaning today is the last full day of life ... I'm thinking about hosting a Pre-Rapture Sex Party. Message me for the details! ;)

   blonde: ugghh what does idk mean? random girl: I don't know! blonde: omg no one knows!!!!!!!!!

   Hey listen..If the rapture really does happen on Saturday, I totally call the popemobile.

   In memory of matcho man R.S. and in preparation for the Rapture, I'm going to buy enough slim jims to snap in to for the next five months

   The Rapture isn't going to happen as long as people keep trying to predict when it will happen. Stop guessing, live life like you know your supposed to and He'll get here when He gets here!

   One of God's greatest pranks would be to leave Rihanna behind as the 'only girl in the world' on saturday.

   Of all the Savages. First I hoped Michael Savage, then I considered Fred Savage, but alas, its the finest Savage of all.

   that akward moment,when you go to a public restroom and the seat is warm!!

   Live, Laugh, Love. If that doesn't work, Ready, Aim and Fire.

   building my weekend playlist. So far I have REM "It's the End of the World" and Anita Baker "Caught Up In the Rapture". Any suggestions?

   read that Macho Man Randy Savage's funeral arrangements will be handled by The Undertaker.

   Driving while snappin in to a slimjim is a bad idea....

   Macho Man died today. He is survived by his wife and their one son Koolaid Man.

   Remember Billy Gilman? Yeah, I'm pretty sure that was Allison Krauss the whole time.

   R.I.P. "Macho Man" Randy Savage. I'll do a flying elbow drop from the foot of the bed to salute you!

   I wonder if anyone's going to organize a Slim Jim light vigil in honor of Randall Mario Poffo.

   RIP Macho Man. He must of had an early boarding pass for the rapture. You will be missed......

   The Macho Man is going to be the coolest and most badass Zombie.

   I lost my balance crawling into bed and leaned my head on the ceiling to prevent from falling over.

   Y couldn't judgement day begin on Monday!? why did it had to ruin my weekend!?