Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon my girlfriend dresses to kill .Coincidentally , she also cooks the same way.
←Rate | 06-09-2011 05:47 by oldmanstone Comments (0)  


   messageicon A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized...lol :P
←Rate | 06-09-2011 04:39 by @anikethmendonca Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm almost sure she's cheating on me with her boyfriend.
←Rate | 06-09-2011 04:02 by BRian Comments (0)  


   messageicon Losing his kidneys at candy mountain
←Rate | 06-09-2011 03:10 by Trent Donahoo Comments (0)  


   messageicon Tina you Fat lard come get some dinner
←Rate | 06-09-2011 03:06 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know methane gas is odorless right? That's why I add the odor to mine so you guys know if I have a leak!
←Rate | 06-09-2011 02:37 by Mike M Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just let a disturbance in the force.
←Rate | 06-09-2011 02:02 by Mike M Comments (0)  


   messageicon Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver
←Rate | 06-09-2011 01:31 by sam eto Comments (0)  


   messageicon says a lot of Democrats are standing behind Congressman Weiner, not because they support his cause, they are simply afraid what would happen to them if they stood in front him.
←Rate | 06-09-2011 01:04 by Darth Ral Comments (0)  


   messageicon some people just don't understand sarcasm.
←Rate | 06-09-2011 00:44 by invisibility Comments (0)  


   messageicon The color 9 is my favorite letter.
←Rate | 06-09-2011 00:32 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You`re beautiful until your Photoshop 30 day trial has gone.
←Rate | 06-09-2011 00:30 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just came up with a new reality show. It's called "Pushing the Kardashians Into Oncoming Traffic." One episode is all you'll need....
←Rate | 06-09-2011 00:22 by ~heZz~ Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Want half of my sandwich?"- Jeffery Dahmer
←Rate | 06-09-2011 00:05 by cerberus13 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Question of the day: If cannibals argue with each other, is it considered a food fight?
←Rate | 06-08-2011 22:37 by EB_Smart Comments (0)  


   messageicon Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me three times, I'm coming to your house with a facking baseball bat.
←Rate | 06-08-2011 22:34 by EB_Smart Comments (0)  


   messageicon learned yesterday to never EVER play "Simon Says" with my 5-yr-old. "Simon Says stick your finger in your butt." What do you do then? Refuse and thus forfeit? Or comply and be humiliated? Either way, he wins.
←Rate | 06-08-2011 22:32 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know what they say about a man and his feet. And that's why I don't find my fear of being raped by a clown irrational.
←Rate | 06-08-2011 22:31 by EB_Smart Comments (0)  


   messageicon I like how Facebook tells me I found these friends using their friend finder. um no I found these friends before I had hair on my balls back when I could have been rich had I thought of Facebook
←Rate | 06-08-2011 22:31 by ptv Comments (0)  


   messageicon was excited this morning when I received an email with a subject line of "Beaver" and an attached pic. My excitement was crushed when I opened it only to discover it was a picture of an actual beaver.
←Rate | 06-08-2011 22:30 Comments (0)  



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