Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Officer I know I ran that red light but its okay I'll just stop twice at the next one. Are we cool?
←Rate | 06-14-2011 11:35 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey homeless guy, quick tip: dont panhandle outside the 99 Cent Store, were not that far from you.
←Rate | 06-14-2011 11:34 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Couples who exchange "sweet nothings" on facebook, stop it, every time you do that I kick a cat.
←Rate | 06-14-2011 11:29 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Who do you have to sleep with around here to sleep with someone around here?!
←Rate | 06-14-2011 11:29 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Couples who exchange "sweet nothing" on facebook, stop it, every time you do that I kick a cat.
←Rate | 06-14-2011 11:29 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If there is any time to pay attention, it is while typing grandfather clocks into an image search.
←Rate | 06-14-2011 11:25 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Finally...a woman who can make me smile without taking her clothes off.
←Rate | 06-14-2011 11:21 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon What has a Klondike bar ever done for me?
←Rate | 06-14-2011 11:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Tip: Always say the stain on your shirt is from today.
←Rate | 06-14-2011 11:04 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You should have to apply for a permit before youre allowed to use the Reply All button.
←Rate | 06-14-2011 11:02 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I dont have a dog, I eat my own homework.
←Rate | 06-14-2011 11:01 Comments (0)  


   messageicon engagement ring: a down-payment for alimony
←Rate | 06-14-2011 11:00 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just to be different, I cry about being single on the 4th of July, and celebrate Valentines Day with explosives.
←Rate | 06-14-2011 10:53 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey couples who write on each others Facebook walls, NO ONE cares how much you love each other, so cut it out!
←Rate | 06-14-2011 10:47 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you invite me to your BBQ and you don't have Southern Comfort then I ain't coming.
←Rate | 06-14-2011 10:45 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Coffee...Meet your Maker!
←Rate | 06-14-2011 10:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I wish instead of the stock market you could buy stock in famous people. This country is already obsessed with celebrities, we might as well have somethin to lose. Instead of hedge funds, you could buy families. I would totally buy Will Smith's family!
←Rate | 06-14-2011 10:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lawyers talk how Doctors write.
←Rate | 06-14-2011 10:28 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If HP made weapons there would be no wars because the stupid ammo would cost more than the guns.
←Rate | 06-14-2011 10:28 Comments (0)  


   messageicon We dont remember anything from last night....Remember
←Rate | 06-14-2011 10:25 Comments (0)  



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