Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Just learned my (now broken) phone is NOT a transformer... Evidently, "Airplane mode" doesn't mean $H!^...
←Rate | 06-17-2011 01:28 Comments (0)  


   messageicon one of life's greatest mysteries is how the boy who wasn't good enough to marry your daughter can be the father of the smartest grandchild in the world.
←Rate | 06-17-2011 00:50 by MTQ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Spilled my skittles in the toilet by accident today as I went to flush.. What I thought was a disaster turned into an awesome 10 second NASCAR race..
←Rate | 06-16-2011 23:49 by BeeP Comments (0)  


   messageicon so I put my phone in airplane mode and threw it up in the air. Let's just say, worst Transformer ever...
←Rate | 06-16-2011 23:48 by BeeP Comments (0)  


   messageicon The akward moment when your college teacher gave you a dead line date for an essay, so you forgot to do it, so you do it at the last day and end up getting a higher grade than your classmates. "THUG LIFE"
←Rate | 06-16-2011 23:45 by 706 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Surround yourself with Contenders, not Pretenders.
←Rate | 06-16-2011 21:43 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Circus + shopping = Walmart
←Rate | 06-16-2011 21:41 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon A Harvard Medical School study has determined that rectal thermometers are still the best way to tell a baby's temperature. Plus, it really teaches the baby who's boss. lol ;)
←Rate | 06-16-2011 21:18 by Trish Comments (0)  


   messageicon People make life so hard. smile be happy. hold no grudges. and have sex
←Rate | 06-16-2011 20:25 by @9inchstrap Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why don't blind people bungee jump? Because it scares the hell out of the dogs
←Rate | 06-16-2011 20:24 Comments (0)  


   messageicon if you have ever bought clothes to match the color of your crocs you need to seriously rethink your life.
←Rate | 06-16-2011 19:48 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Be careful if you see a silver lining in a cloud. It could be another aircraft.
←Rate | 06-16-2011 19:48 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The fact is, whatever you do, good or bad, people will always have something negative to say.
←Rate | 06-16-2011 19:25 by Surge Yarmolyuk Comments (0)  


   messageicon NO! I'm not arguing with you, I'm simply explaining why I'm right DAMMIT!!
←Rate | 06-16-2011 19:19 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I breathe the Dollar Sign_:-$
←Rate | 06-16-2011 19:16 Comments (0)  


   messageicon They asked the congressman was that a picture of your nuts...he said I'm not sure but it did come from my computer".....so my question is do you have random nuts in your harddrive...smh
←Rate | 06-16-2011 19:09 by Shaun K Comments (0)  


   messageicon There are so many better reasons to riot other than hockey... like a shoe sale!
←Rate | 06-16-2011 18:35 by abbybaby34 Comments (0)  


   messageicon It seems everything I like is either illegal, immoral, fattening, married, pregnant, causes cancer, is undyingly stupid or nuts.
←Rate | 06-16-2011 15:10 by Philly Bob Comments (0)  


   messageicon afraid to go to work, my couch seems to be suffering from separation anxiety!
←Rate | 06-16-2011 14:49 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Weiner's press conference was long and hard, but he finally whipped out his resignation after beating around the bush for a few minutes, effectively penetrating the crux of the situation and bringing the story to an explosive climax...
←Rate | 06-16-2011 14:44 by sully Comments (0)  



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