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Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
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She called it off because she found out she wasn't in the will.
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06-15-2011 10:14
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Don't worry Hef, Playmates are like buses, another one will come along in 30minutes.
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06-15-2011 10:11
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Hugh Hefner dumped at the alter! Thats sad after he wasted those whole 2 months getting to know her.
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06-15-2011 10:09
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let's jump to 2050, when I'm at the bingo hall checking out the hot little number with the walker and tramp stamp
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06-15-2011 09:50 by
Judge Coe
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Calling all my ex girlfriends today to tell them I have herpes. I don't really have it, I just don't want any of them to sleep with other people.
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06-15-2011 09:24 by
abbybaby34
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There'd be less accidents if there was a texting lane.
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06-15-2011 09:23 by
abbybaby34
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just bought a new pack of socks to avoid doing laundry tonight.
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06-15-2011 09:23 by
abbybaby34
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Love...it takes hostages and shows zero remorse.
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06-15-2011 09:22 by
abbybaby34
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The best way to win an argument is to play dead.
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06-15-2011 09:21 by
abbybaby34
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If you're an idiot, punch yourself in the face!
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06-15-2011 08:51
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Yes, you are an independant women if you dont rely on a man to get your bills paid!
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06-15-2011 08:13 by
nomalungelo
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Hugh Hefner's 60 year younger fiance called off their wedding due to a 'change of heart'. Does 'change of heart' mean 'saw the prenup'?
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06-15-2011 08:04
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A couple just married were happy with the whole thing. He was happy with the Hole …. and she was happy with the Thing.
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06-15-2011 07:51
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If you go to google and type " why does my " in the search box. Read some of the suggestions on there and you'll see why I hate people.
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06-15-2011 07:51 by
Jackbrass
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No you are not an independant woman... You are just an adult. Having a car, paying yo bills, paying rent is part of adult life
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06-15-2011 07:49 by
KISSTOPHER
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stepped on a corn flake...Does that make me a cereal killer?
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06-15-2011 07:49
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Rice is awesome. Especially if you want like 2000 of something...
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06-15-2011 07:49 by
The Dude
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You may think I'm a loser, but to my goldfish I am "THE GOD OF FLAKES."
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06-15-2011 07:03 by
MTQ
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Just a tip for living a long and happy life: TRY NOT TO DIE
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06-15-2011 06:54
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what goes in dry, comes out wet, and gives you a warm satisfaction?...a teabag
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06-15-2011 05:57
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