Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon they need full length mirrors at the self-checkout line in the grocery store
←Rate | 07-21-2011 10:15 by levon Comments (0)  


   messageicon going to follow people around today with a xbox controller and yell this sims game sucks!
←Rate | 07-21-2011 09:13 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Satan called, he wants his weather back..
←Rate | 07-21-2011 09:01 by Wolf Comments (0)  


   messageicon Organized people are just too lazy to look for things!
←Rate | 07-21-2011 08:49 by Mark Comments (0)  


   messageicon I am the guy who breaks the link in chain letters without even giving a rat's a$$.
←Rate | 07-21-2011 06:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I be getting high just to balance out the lows.
←Rate | 07-21-2011 06:11 by DRAKE Comments (0)  


   messageicon When you smoke weed, it reveals you to yourself.
←Rate | 07-21-2011 06:09 by BOB MARLEY Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ladies, easy way to tell if a guy is married? Look into his eyes, if there is any sign of life left, he's single.
←Rate | 07-21-2011 04:41 by NO BODY Comments (0)  


   messageicon Okay, I've had it with real life, give me my fairy godmother, my prince, and my happily ever after endings.
←Rate | 07-21-2011 03:56 by Nomalungelo Comments (0)  


   messageicon Have you seen the new Friendster? You can now log in using your Facebook account! Like WTF? Hahaha!
←Rate | 07-21-2011 02:11 by Julius Andres Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know what infuriates me? Trying to grab the end of masking tape with my half chewed fingernails, after it has reattached itself to it's body. You know what infuriates me even more? Watching someone else do it.
←Rate | 07-21-2011 02:03 by Michek Comments (0)  


   messageicon it's so hot out today that the squirrels are wearing oven mitts to hold their own nuts.
←Rate | 07-21-2011 01:52 by jadedangel71 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The space bar means everything... Its the difference bewteen "She gave me herpies" & "She gave me her pies." One's more delicious
←Rate | 07-21-2011 01:01 by @demiroquai Comments (0)  


   messageicon I taught myself how to drive by playing GTA San Andreas! THUG LIFE
←Rate | 07-21-2011 00:35 by 706 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I like to wear a parachute on airplanes and act smug during turbulence.
←Rate | 07-21-2011 00:04 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's so hot in MY town, gangs are doing drive-bys with squirt guns!
←Rate | 07-21-2011 00:03 by Goodeolboy Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm canadian and I want to say to America, Hey I love you guys, but seriously, you gotta take Jersey Shore off the air! You guys work on that and we'll see what we can do about Nickleback and Justin Beiber.
←Rate | 07-20-2011 23:10 by JeremyCakes Comments (1)  


   messageicon My youngest turns 13 in a couple of weeks, which means I'll have three teenagers in the house. I can only assume that qualifies me for some sort of federal disaster relief funding.
←Rate | 07-20-2011 21:55 by Hot Tea Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's so hot that I have found out (the hard way) that my seat belt buckle could be used as a branding iron.
←Rate | 07-20-2011 21:39 Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Stop, Drop, and Roll" is not JUST an effective fire safety technique, but also a very memorable way of getting out of a boring conversation. :P
←Rate | 07-20-2011 21:25 Comments (0)  



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