Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon If I don't have time to make coffee, I pull out a nose hair instead.
←Rate | 07-22-2011 19:22 by Mike M Comments (0)  


   messageicon can fat people go skinny dipping?
←Rate | 07-22-2011 19:14 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon This is how my relationship goes.....I turn her on the moment I get home from work and she satisfies my needs. I love my air conditioner!
←Rate | 07-22-2011 18:39 Comments (0)  


   messageicon old enough to remember when MTV wasn't just a camera someone left on in a trailer home.
←Rate | 07-22-2011 18:30 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Its 103 outside an I'm inside watchin tv under my snuggie.. Thanx A/C!
←Rate | 07-22-2011 17:37 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Im tryin to beat The Heat like Dirk Nowitzki.
←Rate | 07-22-2011 17:33 by L Comments (0)  


   messageicon The amount of times I've "apparently" won an ipod an ipad or an iphone while I'm on the internet would put apple out of business!
←Rate | 07-22-2011 17:32 Comments (0)  


   messageicon So me && grandma go for a joy ride and I turn on the radio, she says" who in the devil is this?" I replyed Grandma, his name is 50 cent, she then said " well I'll give him a dollar to shut up!"
←Rate | 07-22-2011 17:30 by Sky Comments (0)  


   messageicon Who the hell put the sun on HIGH?????
←Rate | 07-22-2011 17:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wow it's hot!.....I'm sweating like a Priest at a Cub Scout picnic! ツ
←Rate | 07-22-2011 16:49 by totalpackage Comments (0)  


   messageicon Every flaw in my character is quietly salvaged as evidence of my genius.
←Rate | 07-22-2011 16:02 by Bridget Comments (0)  


   messageicon A necktie functions like a tourniquet, preventing excess blood from entering the head.
←Rate | 07-22-2011 16:01 by Bridget Comments (0)  


   messageicon “Tired of online dating? You're not alone.” Yes you are. That's why you're dating online.
←Rate | 07-22-2011 16:00 by Bridget Comments (0)  


   messageicon I wrote a joke about the short duration of cocaine, in fact the joke itself is a one-liner.
←Rate | 07-22-2011 16:00 by Bridget Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I could find a deaf, mute hot blonde....I would give her the world!!
←Rate | 07-22-2011 15:43 by urboyblue Comments (0)  


   messageicon My chat box is now open for flirting.
←Rate | 07-22-2011 15:32 Comments (0)  


   messageicon has been on so many blind dates I should get a free guide dog!
←Rate | 07-22-2011 15:00 by twan Comments (0)  


   messageicon American presidents: ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☺ ☻
←Rate | 07-22-2011 14:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you get drunk, don't worry. I'll let my sex drive.
←Rate | 07-22-2011 14:26 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't mean to sound sleezy but tease me I don't want it if it's that easy.
←Rate | 07-22-2011 14:23 by 2PAC Comments (0)  



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