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Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
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TRUE STORY: I got 99 chargers but my phone aint 1
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07-28-2011 23:07 by
brian_Allen
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We let you do whatever you want. Otherwise, why the hell would you ever come here?? - Nevada's State Motto
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07-28-2011 22:39 by
SuthernFukr
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Couch pillows are really just fart silencers.
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07-28-2011 22:39 by
SuthernFukr
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I do procrastinate more than I should, but it always gives me something to do tomorrow...
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07-28-2011 22:38 by
SuthernFukr
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Saw this guy drowning so I threw him a life saver. His last words were, "what is this.. candy?"
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07-28-2011 22:35 by
Aaron
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Some smartphone you turned out to be. You should have known better than to let me call my damn Ex.
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07-28-2011 22:25 by
BEGO
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You're really not as bad as people say. You're much, much worse.
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07-28-2011 22:23 by
BEGO
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Just owning the Washington Redskins was his first stupid mistake.
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07-28-2011 20:53
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If I'm going to go to the trouble of wishing your sorry, unknown, only 87 friends a$$ a happy birthday, the least you could do is acknowledge it with a "like".
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07-28-2011 20:45 by
MTQ
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David Guetta, "all the crazy sh** I did tonight those will be the best memories". So, will they?!
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07-28-2011 20:32
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The beat you hear outside the club sounds very similar to the sound a cat makes before throwing up.
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07-28-2011 20:11
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I just laugh at all the things that say they are 3-D ready. Alchol has been 3-D ready for 200 years!
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07-28-2011 19:40
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If you don't normally send me regular texts and/or you don't respond to my regular text than DO NOT send me those idiotic Fwd texts!!
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07-28-2011 19:35
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Some times I like to take my kids down to the car lot and show them the nice Aston Martin V12 Vantage I'd be driving if they had never been born.
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07-28-2011 19:26
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So did all those kids that had the skate or die t shirts in the 90s die?
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07-28-2011 19:23 by
flinnie
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So you say Red Bull just isn't enough kick for you anymore. How about I set you on fire? That will get you up and moving. For a bit anyway.
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07-28-2011 19:21 by
flinnie
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I feel a disturbance in the Force. Something tells me that Dan Snyder, owner of the Washington Redskins is about to do something stupid.
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07-28-2011 19:13 by
flinnie
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I got 99 chargers but my phone Aint 1
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07-28-2011 19:09 | Tags: Filtered
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Obama is losing support from his own party. In fact Jimmy Carter just compared him to Jimmy Carter.
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07-28-2011 18:37 by
jrbirk
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Persistence • 1 yes is worth 100 no's!
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07-28-2011 17:55 by
@cboyklik
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