Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon I just saw a baby with a t-shirt that said, "I'm what happened in Vegas!”
←Rate | 08-05-2011 03:06 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon To people who say love is more important than money, have you ever tried paying your bills with a hug?
←Rate | 08-05-2011 03:03 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon Games will be played, lies will be told, hearts and promises will be broken, feelings will be hurt, tears will fall, people will change, trust will be betrayed, and rumors will spread. But through it all, life will always go on.
←Rate | 08-05-2011 02:39 Comments (0)  


   messageicon i wonder when Sarah Palin is going to weigh in on this Stocky Markety Swoopsy Dowsy stuff.
←Rate | 08-05-2011 01:26 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear boys, the whole 'speed-by-girls-in-my-noisy-truck-and-impress-them' doesn't really work...but, then again you probably didn't need to hear that from me did you?
←Rate | 08-05-2011 01:01 by your mom Comments (0)  


   messageicon Not to sound like an old maid, but why do people think they need to be in a relationship to be happy? Those who can stand on their own two feet are the ones that I admire most. Be strong and independent. Have patience and love will come.
←Rate | 08-05-2011 00:59 by your mom Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some guys make me want to roundhouse kick them in the nutz.
←Rate | 08-05-2011 00:57 by your mom Comments (0)  


   messageicon The price of books is ridiculous! We should at least get the teacher's edition for that price, dang...a free puppy wouldn't hurt either.
←Rate | 08-05-2011 00:57 by P.O.\'d student Comments (0)  


   messageicon You're more shallow than a kiddie pool.
←Rate | 08-05-2011 00:52 by your mom Comments (0)  


   messageicon Take a hint: you don't look cool peeling out of a parking lot. You aren't a professional drag racer and it's f'n annoying. Now go buy some new tires.
←Rate | 08-05-2011 00:50 by your mom Comments (0)  


   messageicon The later it gets at night, the funnier everything is. When you're laughing at nothing...it's time to go to bed.
←Rate | 08-05-2011 00:45 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't need damn a brain, I have google.
←Rate | 08-05-2011 00:44 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Prvo me upoznaj pa mi onda sudi, a ne po tome što pričaju ljudi ! :)
←Rate | 08-05-2011 00:28 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ya know it's a bad day when you wreck yourself before you check yourself.
←Rate | 08-04-2011 23:27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Shark Week Thought: Guy who takes his wife/girlfriend to the ocean/beach when it's that time of the month has a hidden agenda.
←Rate | 08-04-2011 23:25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon JERSEY SNORE. And No! That's not a typo ;)
←Rate | 08-04-2011 23:13 by RM Comments (0)  


   messageicon Had 12 girls banging on my bedroom door last night... I said, No matter how hard you bang I am not letting you out
←Rate | 08-04-2011 23:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey Facebook.. If I "UNFRIEND" someone.. Please don't put them in my "People you may know".. Of Course I F*ckin know them! I just choose not to be friends with them!
←Rate | 08-04-2011 21:46 Comments (0)  


   messageicon MLB looking into Illegal poker games at Oscar Madison's apartment. Felix Unger has no comment.
←Rate | 08-04-2011 21:29 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm the go to guy when it comes to going to a guy to find out what guy to go to.
←Rate | 08-04-2011 21:25 by Aaron Comments (0)  



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