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All true wisdom is found on T-Shirts 
walking along smiling to myself with the autumn sunshine,warming my face, kicking the golden leaves like in my childhood... WTF clean up after your god damn dogs! mutha f***ers!!!!!!
What do a nearsighted gynecologist and a puppy have in common? A wet nose.
Imagine living with 3 wives and never leaving the house for 5 years... I think Osama called the US Navy Seals himself
love a girl with a trimmed bush because it makes it easier to see into her window at night.
If women were born with remote controls, the most commonly used buttons would be: PAUSE, MUTE, FAST-FORWARD, and SLEEP.
looking for CHANGE? Vote Zuckerberg for president!
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol at my house may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra and panties
A crazy girlfriend is cute. But a crazy Ex-girlfriend is a nightmare
Fellas: treat her special EVERYDAY, not just on a HOLIDAY or her BIRTHDAY..
I bet you 20 dollas I'm broke
The new facebook has been renamed "Facebook Inception". It has a newsfeed within a newsfeed within a newsfeed.
Miss Right looks Wrong without make-up.
Ladies: you should be grateful for even the smallest of things a man does for you. Why? Because he took time out of his day, to make your day more beautiful and special.
Oprah makes $315,000,000/year = $26,000,000/month = $6,000,000/week = $850,000/day = $35,000/hour = $600/minute = $10/second
"That's The Night That The Lights Went Out In Georgia"
I can tell by your sarcastic undertones, rude comments and shear lack of common decency, that you and I could be best friends in no time.
the new Judical System … GUILTY UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY … and this is a country that is always trying to rule another !!
the new layout on facebook has me more confused than a baby in a strip club....wtf?
Yeah, keep complaining about the new Facebook. Unless you PAY FOR IT, I don't think any of us have the room to complain.
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