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Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
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Life is like a vacuum cleaner, as soon as you make a firm step, it starts to suck.
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09-15-2011 13:54 by
@aqabawe
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motto of the day is: Sin, Repent, Repeat.
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09-15-2011 13:12 by
roned
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Words will only hurt when you believe them.
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09-15-2011 12:59
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I take a viagr@ tablet every night before I go to sleep... stops me from rolling out of bed!
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09-15-2011 12:58 by
@clarkysj
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Some people just need a hug... around their neck... with a rope.
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09-15-2011 12:53
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69 will never be a normal number.
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09-15-2011 12:52
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We all have a family member who think they're a professional photographer.
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09-15-2011 12:48
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WEED IS BAD! We should burn it.
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09-15-2011 12:46
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One of my favorite hobbies before Facebook was having a life.
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09-15-2011 12:44
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"Police! OPEN the damn Door" "Not with that attitude, Mister."
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09-15-2011 12:40
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Condom Ad: If you are not 100% satisfied with our product , Happy Fathers Day!
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09-15-2011 12:38
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I'm now willing to admit that we're stuck with polka dots. They're not f***ing going anywhere.
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09-15-2011 12:11 by
SuthernFukr
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It's normal to have a breakfast chat alone in your kitchen with the ghost of Nell Carter, right?
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09-15-2011 12:10 by
SuthernFukr
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There's a reminder on my calendar for tomorrow that inexplicably just says "LEOPARD". This has been bothering me all month.
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09-15-2011 10:34 by
SuthernFukr
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This is how you know you're at a TX auction: you're in a barn, there's no air-conditioning and there's free booze.
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09-15-2011 10:31 by
SuthernFukr
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I love food samples. I hate the whole routine that comes after: pick up the product, nod, all while having no intention of buying it.
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09-15-2011 10:29 by
@marqattacks
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Remember that there's always someone cooler, smarter, stronger or sexier than you. That would be me.
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09-15-2011 10:28 by
SuthernFukr
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I don't mind when older folks decide to relax and slow down. I just wish they wouldn't do it in their cars.
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09-15-2011 10:27 by
SuthernFukr
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Weekend's coming up. What do you say we surf the real world?
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09-15-2011 10:27 by
SuthernFukr
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The main difference between The North and The South is, that in The North, "Blow Pop" is a noun, not a verb.
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09-15-2011 10:26 by
Mick F
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