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Spread you open slowly Lick you with my tongue Dip you in my milk..... Damn oreos are good!
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09-25-2011 16:31 by
michelle
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Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom
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09-25-2011 16:26 by
booger
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I am dark and handsome. When it's dark, I'm handsome.
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09-25-2011 16:12 by
klik
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My wife says I'm too nosey... at least, that's what she wrote in her diary.
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09-25-2011 16:10 by
booger
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Just saw a guy using a payphone. I can only assume he's being told where to deliver the ransom money
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09-25-2011 16:05 by
invasion
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Who else puts LOL or LMAO or ROFL knowing good and damn well your sitting there with a straight face
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09-25-2011 16:00 by
booger
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I love when you go down on me! you relieve so much stress and tension but when I feel it getting good you go back up.... DAMN GAS PRICES!
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09-25-2011 15:48 by
michelle
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"Monday" like Jerry Seinfeld says "Newman!"
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09-25-2011 15:44 by
invasion
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Brass Monkey - That funky Monkey Brass Monkey - Junkie That funky Monkey. That's funny, right? No? Dang.
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09-25-2011 15:39 by
Corn Squeezins
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If sex between 3 people is called a Threesome and sex between 2 people is called a Twosome... Why is Handsome still a compliment? ;)
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09-25-2011 15:31 by
myshitdontstink
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When you're stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate, and sweets. Why? Because STRESSED spelled backwards spells DESSERTS. ;)
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09-25-2011 15:29 by
booger
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Just saw the neighbor's little kid trying to put some whipped cream on his pet cat. I'm thinking he overheard something last night he wasn't supposed to
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09-25-2011 15:25 by
fukdaworld
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There is Waaay to much stuff moving around on Facebook! My ADD is definately getting the best of me now!
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09-25-2011 14:39
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hey were dudes it's Sunday and our teams are playing, were gonna talk about football, you wanna make a good wife one day then get used to it
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09-25-2011 14:38
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Ay, were dudes it's Sunday and our teams are playing, were gonna talk about football, you wanna make a good wife one day then get used to it
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09-25-2011 14:37
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That moment when you hit the submit button and realize you just misspelled a word you went over 100x's with your 7 yr. olds spelling words.
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09-25-2011 14:29
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Shagged this model who works for Abercrombie & Fitch last night... She was amazing, them new mannequins are so realistic!
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09-25-2011 14:29 by
Memz
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Do you think the employee dicount at a Dollar General Store is,"Here, just Take it."?
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09-25-2011 14:23
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You can't buy love.."That's called prostitution"
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09-25-2011 14:23
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silence produce the best answer to a stupid question..
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09-25-2011 14:20
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