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Don't you hate it when you see a kid picking her nose in public and her Mom , who is aware, thinks it's “cute”. Makes me want to say “Eat it. It's finger licking good.” 
What the deuce!! Talk about a knee trembling, ball tingling experience 2 start your day! Natural Source mint and tea tree shower gel is awesome!!! :)
Hello, I am the new Facebook Representative in your area. You can give me your check or money order for $29.99 a month for your account to stay actvie...
Sometimes I meow back at cats.
If you plan on meeting someone on facebook who has no pictures on their profile page. A word of caution. Better you should bury your face in Rosie O'Donnell's a$$ for 6 hours, than hook up with that monster.
I was just awarded the first place trophy for laziness. All I need now is for someone to accept it on my behalf.
When we set our clocks back, will that effect "Hammer Time"?
An average person thinks he isn't!!
IF YOU COPY AND PASTE SOMEONE'S STATUS THAT IS WRITTEN IN ALL CAPS, OTHERS NEED TO BEWARE!!! YOU JUST FAILED THE SOCIAL MEDIA IQ TEST, YOU MORON. THIS INDICATES THAT YOU ARE NOT PLAYING WITH A FULL DECK AND ARE MOST GULLIBLE AND PRONE FOR COMPUTER HACKING
Did anyone else get prompted for payment for facebook?
"Love is the more than the sum of yourself but rather the desire to be the sum of the person you love and yourself. It is far more rewarding to desire to do for the one you love more than you do for yourself."
don't you just hate it when your mobile rings during a meeting and you have to wake up??!
Arch West, the creator of Doritos, has passed away at the age of 97. Do you think he'll have a triangle shaped tombstone???
Had a great weekend, now Monday just like always comes and steps in and ruins it
What's with all those sub categories in facebook's relationship status option? For example...what's a Domestic Partnership? She vacuums while he dusts?
typed "X-men" into a google image search and didn't quite get the result I wanted.... Who the heck is this Wolvarine guy anyway?
Dear birds who so graciously woke me before my alarm clock did.... F-CK YOU!!
I heard sex at age 90.....is like trying to shoot pool with a rope
yes I am embarrassed of certain things I did in my past.....you reminding me wont really hurt me any more then it already did, pain is gone only scars left and those dont hurt just reminder , I DON'T NEED YOU TO REMIND ME
My idea of artificial intelligence is where the Porn tab changes into the Google tab the moment someone knocks on the door
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