Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon $1200 for a redbone hound pup....fn puppy pimps!!!
←Rate | 10-12-2011 12:43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon 2 THINGS THAT DON'T MIX - Me and my ex
←Rate | 10-12-2011 12:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lets Be Honest, slow internet, is worse than bad sex.
←Rate | 10-12-2011 12:40 by NO BODY Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't want to hear you complain that you can't afford basic cable when you play $20 a week on the Lotto.
←Rate | 10-12-2011 12:38 by Goodeolboy Comments (0)  


   messageicon This laundry detergent says I get 20oz free, but the cashier says I still have to buy the whole bottle. :(
←Rate | 10-12-2011 11:54 by SuthernFukr Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just because your neighbors aren't on vacation doesn't mean you still can't go through their mail.
←Rate | 10-12-2011 11:47 by SuthernFukr Comments (0)  


   messageicon Trying to explain to my blackberry with the death of Mr. Jobs that usually we take a MOMENT of silence not DAYS!!
←Rate | 10-12-2011 10:19 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If it begins with Twi, Bieb, or Kardash, I'm not interested.
←Rate | 10-12-2011 10:03 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I get re-pissed about an old situation whenever I have a flashback about it.
←Rate | 10-12-2011 10:02 by NO BODY Comments (0)  


   messageicon The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.
←Rate | 10-12-2011 07:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Smile, and the world will smile with you. Laugh and they'll all think your on drugs.
←Rate | 10-12-2011 07:36 by Viper Comments (0)  


   messageicon Every morning I long to hold you, I need you, I want you, I love your warmth... your smell, your taste... Ohhh coffee I love you. Good Morning!
←Rate | 10-12-2011 07:33 by Viper Comments (0)  


   messageicon Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?
←Rate | 10-12-2011 07:32 Comments (0)  


   messageicon what's the difference between 'fat chance' and 'slim chance'?
←Rate | 10-12-2011 07:28 Comments (0)  


   messageicon More SAD NEWS for the music industry: Soulja Boy is working on a new album.
←Rate | 10-12-2011 07:28 Comments (0)  


   messageicon life is all about ass. You're either covering it, laughing it off, kicking it, kissing it, busting it or trying to get a piece of it.
←Rate | 10-12-2011 07:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I like mario. he's cool. he's all like " hello, I'm maaarrio, I'm a Italian plumber created by japanese people, who speaks English and looks like a Mexican."
←Rate | 10-12-2011 06:46 by g0re Comments (0)  


   messageicon My wife was in the bathroom for hours getting dressed to go out when finally she swung open the door and asked "tell me honestly, do I look fat in this?". I replied "yes love, but to be fair, its a small bathroom"
←Rate | 10-12-2011 06:38 by Monkeyboy126 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My daughter came home from school and said that a boy showed her his pen!s. She said it reminded her of a peanut. I said, "Why, was it small? She said, "No, it was salty."
←Rate | 10-12-2011 06:06 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon If these walls could talk, they'd say "OH GOD, This HURTS! Get these nails out of me! Why did you paint me Mauve? Make it stop!"
←Rate | 10-12-2011 05:51 by flinnie Comments (0)  



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