Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon So judging by their response, most folks around here don't shave their pubes.
←Rate | 10-25-2011 08:45 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes I like to get behind one of the empty registers at WalMart and wait till someone puts all their junk on the belt and then say, "Sorry, this register is closed."
←Rate | 10-25-2011 08:32 Comments (0)  


   messageicon going to bed early cause I've got some awesoming to do tomorrow.
←Rate | 10-25-2011 08:31 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I was a child I performed on TV for a very short time. Mom came in the living room, saw me up on it, and made me get down though.
←Rate | 10-25-2011 08:30 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm not saying you're lazy, but you should try out for “American Idle"
←Rate | 10-25-2011 04:16 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sadly, even a "Hello Kitty" shaped turd would probably sell on eBay
←Rate | 10-25-2011 03:44 by Eric S. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Guy: I love u. Girl: Aww really? Boy: Yep, Its my favorite vowel.
←Rate | 10-25-2011 02:09 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wondering if your adopted because your the only sexy one in the family.
←Rate | 10-25-2011 02:07 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I am ever in the middle of a shooting, I will just lay on the floor and act like someone already killed me.
←Rate | 10-25-2011 02:05 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Hey, what's up?" "Gas prices." "You know what I mean, like.. What's crackin'?" "Nutshells." "Really? Fine. What's poppin'?" "Corn."
←Rate | 10-25-2011 02:05 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon I dont have a problem with guys wearing white pointed shoes, just as long as they don't curl up, dude be looking like sum extra on the set of Aladdin.
←Rate | 10-25-2011 01:16 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Redneck Magician , couldn't pull a rabbit out of his hat so he pulled a hare out of his bag
←Rate | 10-25-2011 00:41 Comments (0)  


   messageicon ittle known fact: The toothbrush originated in Alabama. Everywhere else it was called a teethbrush.
←Rate | 10-24-2011 23:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Facebook is really just a museum of all my failed relationships.
←Rate | 10-24-2011 23:27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Bin Laden, Gadaffi, Saddam, and Maliki are part of the occupy Hell movement.
←Rate | 10-24-2011 23:27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have given up on browsing online dating websites and have moved on to the SPCA Cat Adoptions page instead.
←Rate | 10-24-2011 23:24 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey girl, did it hurt when you fell from heaven after Lucifer's rebellion?
←Rate | 10-24-2011 23:08 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon My neighbors parked to close to my car again. And hey look at that, Somebody keyed their car again.
←Rate | 10-24-2011 23:01 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Girls on Facebook: "Getting Starbucks with Jenny!" 2 minutes later: 141 pictures and 6 videos uploaded.
←Rate | 10-24-2011 22:51 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon What the USA Government needs is a Department of Common Sense.
←Rate | 10-24-2011 22:49 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  



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