Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon You made me laugh so hard, tears ran down my leg.
←Rate | 10-27-2011 20:09 Comments (0)  


   messageicon you know it's holiday time when you see a charlie brown special on tv
←Rate | 10-27-2011 20:06 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wow...Im sittin at work watchin the snow fall... Its friggin October! Mother Nature must of finally hit menopause.. That fridgid b!tch made it snow!! Bring fall back!!!
←Rate | 10-27-2011 19:42 by Seanathon Comments (0)  


   messageicon One day, your life will flash b4 your eyes. Make sure its worth watching.
←Rate | 10-27-2011 18:54 Comments (0)  


   messageicon been running up to strangers, tapping them shouting "YOUR IT!" and running away.
←Rate | 10-27-2011 18:45 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you having spell problems I feel bad for you son, I got 99 problems but a witch aint one!!! >:(
←Rate | 10-27-2011 18:37 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Blah Blah Blah can you Blah Blah Blah . Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah . I need you to Blah Blah Blah . I think my wife is talking to me
←Rate | 10-27-2011 17:13 Comments (0)  


   messageicon "I don't want anyone to know I'm the one who said this" - Anonymous
←Rate | 10-27-2011 16:55 by Doc Noland Comments (0)  


   messageicon Definition of bravery: Trying to fart when you have diarrhea.
←Rate | 10-27-2011 16:13 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't make decisions when your angry or horny =P
←Rate | 10-27-2011 16:05 by @OMFG_Rel8able Comments (0)  


   messageicon The only thing I can truly count on in life is a calculator.
←Rate | 10-27-2011 15:23 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes a married man needs to cheat just to break the monogamy.
←Rate | 10-27-2011 15:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Good to have a blind friend,,if you fart just plug your nose and point and nod.
←Rate | 10-27-2011 15:16 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you don't have anything nice to say... Put it on twitter
←Rate | 10-27-2011 15:04 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Today I heard the band Queen is holding auditions for a lead singer via youtube. I was gonna audition but I look ridiculous in a leotard.
←Rate | 10-27-2011 14:36 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I heard that girls like it when I play hard to get, So I've locked myself in my apartment & turned off my phone. Now, I wait.
←Rate | 10-27-2011 14:35 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hosting a little family dinner party tomorrow. Do you think 1 box of Cheerios will be enough for 6 people?
←Rate | 10-27-2011 14:34 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm thinking of getting tattoos on my shoulders that say "Place legs here".
←Rate | 10-27-2011 14:32 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Never piss off a woman on her period...scratch that...Never piss off a woman, period.
←Rate | 10-27-2011 14:27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The new craze: Corduroy pillows! They're making head lines.
←Rate | 10-27-2011 14:25 Comments (0)  



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