Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Just thinking of how confusing it would be to all the little tricker treaters if I dressed up as santa for Halloween and handed out candy.....
←Rate | 10-30-2011 21:52 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Halloween.. The only time of the year where it's ok to take candy from a stranger..
←Rate | 10-30-2011 21:52 Comments (0)  


   messageicon so what are you going to be for halloween? well, I was thinking about being, well, intoxicated
←Rate | 10-30-2011 21:52 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'll be spending most of today putting Santa hats on all my Halloween decorations...
←Rate | 10-30-2011 21:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If a girl is stupid enough to love you after you broke her heart, I guarantee you, she is the one.
←Rate | 10-30-2011 21:47 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon The whole concept of Halloween is wierd. Everyone dresses funny and total strangers reward them with candy.
←Rate | 10-30-2011 21:44 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why do people yell "Hello?" in horror movies. What do you think the killer is going to say? "I'm making a sandwich in the kitchen. Want one?"
←Rate | 10-30-2011 21:44 by @mattdinney Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't hate you, it's just my attitude has some major issues with your personality.
←Rate | 10-30-2011 21:42 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Vick is abusing those cowboys worse than he did his dogs
←Rate | 10-30-2011 21:33 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My life is like a Lambourghini. It's going too fast, and it costs too much.
←Rate | 10-30-2011 21:21 by aza Comments (0)  


   messageicon it polite or rude to slide a note into the bathroom stall next to you that says, "heard you farting but it's ok you're in the right place :)"
←Rate | 10-30-2011 21:19 by aza Comments (0)  


   messageicon Today I chased a plastic bag down the street.. Not to capture any great beauty or anything.. It had my weed in it.
←Rate | 10-30-2011 21:19 by aza Comments (0)  


   messageicon My hobbies are gardening, origami and meditation. In other words: growing weed, rolling a fat one, and passing out in a stupor.
←Rate | 10-30-2011 21:19 by aza Comments (0)  


   messageicon Yo Momma is so fat, that when she sat on the iPhone she created the iPad.
←Rate | 10-30-2011 21:18 by aza Comments (0)  


   messageicon Never ever change your ringtone to an eerie or scary one around halloween because some idiot might call you in the middle of the night while you're in a deep sleep. On a related note, sh*t stains are difficult to get out of sheets.
←Rate | 10-30-2011 20:01 by Scare A Ella Comments (0)  


   messageicon waiting alone in the car; Everyone outside automatically becomes a rapist...
←Rate | 10-30-2011 19:53 by Aza Comments (0)  


   messageicon attention!! there is a football team in the Dallas /Fort worth area, runs Bad, cant do reverse, have not found title in years. if intrested, pls contact owner who walk the side lines of Billion dollar house . no calls after regular season!
←Rate | 10-30-2011 19:30 by flyty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Thank you: 'hard taco shells', for surviving the factory, delivery trucks, and small food stores and then breaking at the moment I put something inside you.
←Rate | 10-30-2011 18:52 by Daheavy1 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Oh you're too good for me?! Last I checked you were knocked up when you were 13...
←Rate | 10-30-2011 18:34 Comments (0)  


   messageicon S/o to all the pedophiles out nervously candy shopping for their big perverted day. Ol nasty asses
←Rate | 10-30-2011 18:19 Comments (0)  



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